Atuality *editing*

Chapter 14

I'm sitting in the chair in my room. It's dark. The only light is from the moon shining through the window.

Where are the other boys? Did they go out without me?

"Dad?" I call out.

"I'm right here," I hear a voice behind me. It's not Davids.

I turn around to see who it is. It's my biological dad. Of course.

"You're not my dad," I said.

"Who is then?" he asked.

"David."

"Wrong," he said. "I'm the closest thing to a dad as you're going to get."

"More like the farthest thing from it actually," I said.

"Come on" he said. "I wasn't that bad."

"You and mom tortured me for years!" I yelled.

"It could have been worse," he said. "I could've tried to kill you like Max's dad did. But I didn't."

"I wish you would have."

He takes out a bat from the other side of the dresser and hits me in the stomach with it.

I fall down to the floor, trying to gasp for air but I can't. It goes on like this for what seems like forever. When I finally get air, I start coughing, blood coming out.

"What do you want?!" I yell, but it comes out as more of a light raspy voice.

"I already told you our last encounter," I said. "By the way, I missed you last night. Where were you?"

"I don't want to talk to you anymore. Please, just leave me alone,"  I said crying.

He hit me with the bat once more on the back. I start crying even more.

"Look at you," he said. "You're so pathetic. Let's not forget stupid. I mean you couldn't even kill yourself."

"Thanks to you," I said.

It's amazing how I keep talking back to him, knowing how much torture he's putting me through. But I don't really care. I'm hoping he'll kill me.

"Why do you want to die so bad?" he asked.

"There's nothing left to live for," I said. "You already took the two most important things away from me. So just kill me already."

"The most important things to you for now," he said.

"What do you mean?"

"There's more things to come," he said. "I've got to keep you around for them. And I expect visits every night from now on. And don't tell anyone about them ever again or there will be serious consequences. Got it?"

"Yes sir," I say defeated.

I woke up in a bright white room. Great.

"Chris what were you thinking?!" David yells.

"I just wanted to be done," I said. 

I sound like I've given up on everything. The sad truth is I have. I don't even feel sad anymore, just numb.

"Why?" he asked. I didn't answer. "Answer me."

"Why should I answer you?" I said getting angry.

"Because I'm your father. So I deserve an explanation."

"You're not my dad David!" I yelled. "No one is! No one gets to call themselves my dad! I don't have one and wish everyone would just stop trying to be!"

"What happened to you?" he asked. "You're not the same Chris I adopted five months ago."

Has it really only been five months? It feels like years. I love David. I just can't let him get close to me. I can't let anyone get close to me.

"There will be more. And I've got to keep you around for that."

"No I'm not," I said. "Are you just now realizing that? Because I've noticed for weeks now?"

"Don't give me your attitude," he warns. "I'm still your father. Whether you like it or not."

"And what will happen if I don't stop?" I challenge. "You're going to throw me back out on the street? Hit me? Ground me? From what friends David? Nothing you do is going to get to me. So good luck"

"Hit you?" David said. "What even made you think that I would ever do that."

"Look me in the eyes and tell me you've never thought about laying a hand on any one of us," I said. He stayed silent. "Exactly."

"Thinking about it is different from doing it," he said. "It's just a thought, it doesn't hurt anyone unless you put action behind it. And I was never going to. Thinking something like that is completely normal. I don't know what you're biological-"

"It doesn't matter what they did to me!" I said. "And I sure don't want to have some kind of deep talk with you or with anyone!"

"Chris, you need-"

"No I don't!" I said. "You don't know what I need. You haven't known me that long! Just get out! And tell the boys I won't be speaking to them either!"

"You know, I really miss the old Chris," he says standing up and leaving.

So do I David.