This reflection paper was for my Philippine History class. Ms. Naiviv told us to read two articles written by a Filipino and a Korean who used to live in the Philippines to study, and she required us to write a reflection paper about it, so ito na 'yon. Dalawa ang isinulat kong reflection paper ngunit hindi ko tinapos at pinunit ko na lamang 'yong una because while writing it, I felt like shit.
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In the middle of writing the 4th paragraph of the reflection paper I have to pass to you, ma'am, I stopped. I stopped scribbling for I felt like I was doing it wrong. I stopped because the words I was writing didn't seem right. I felt like crap, and I still feel like it while writing this.
Last time I felt like this was a year ago. When some people belittled me. When they questioned my intelligence and ability. I felt like my confidence crumbled. No. My confidence really crumbled. I lost it the moment I lost my trust to myself. I also lost the appetite to study real hard and aim for honors just because of what happened fourteen months ago. I, then, realized that your best will never be enough for people whose mind and heart are close when it comes to you.
But while I'm reading the first article, I realized that maybe, just maybe, I didn't do my best that time. Maybe the things that I thought were my best weren't really my best shots. Maybe it was only good and not my best. Yes, reading the first article was offending, saddening and maddening. It showed how a Filipino thinks so low of his fellow countrymen. And then it hit me. Oh, maybe he was just using reverse psychology to awaken the sleeping faith of Filipinos for this country. Maybe that was his way to tell us that we need to fight to prove that ". . . Filipinos do not have any brains. . . do not have any stamina. . . do not have any guts," are not true.
To Mr. Jaeyoun Kim, I am Rix Ibarra, a proud Filipino, and I love my country. I love Philippines. You've said in your message that you've cried for Korea, your home, and also for the Philippines. If you will ask me if I've cried for my country, I will answer you with all honesty that I have. No. I haven't cried for my country. I never did. But that doesn't mean that my heart isn't breaking every time I would see my country in every worst scenario possible.
Filipino people deserve the best out of Philippines. Philippines deserves the best out of Filipino people. We can only grasp the best if we have strong faith and if we know how to act accordingly. We will be the best if we will give our heart in everything that we do and let our God be the center of our nation. Indeed, love is the key for us to obtain the greater heights the Philippines had been fighting since day one.
Filipinos should do the thing my father taught me: GIVE. Give as long as you still have something to give. We should help one another for a nation without unity is like a promising word without action. We must give. We must hope. We must love. We must act. We must unite.
"I discover that every person is worthy to be loved. Trust in love because it makes changes possible. Love changes you and me. It changes people, contexts and relationships. It changes the world. Please love your neighborhood and country."
I will definitely love my neighborhood and my country. I will love Philippines, my homeland, until forever. Not just because I am a Filipino but also because I am a child of God.
