My Depressive Mind

Depression

I feel like such a hypocrite
A suicidal girl telling another suicidal girl that she should stay...
I hate seeing other people like this
ESPECIALLY people I care about.
Depression is all the pain of a physical illness combined with all the hopelessness of a mental one...
And that's what makes it so horrible.
It's not something everyone understands
In fact, the only people who can really say, "I know..." are the people who have experienced it themselves
And sometimes these people don't make it.
Or they're too depressed to even talk about it
Depression is heavy
SO fucking heavy.
It weighs down your feet.
It sits on your shoulder, whispering its poison into your ear until it drowns your mind.
It presses down on your chest so that even the simple act of breathing is a struggle.
It drains you completely
Of energy...
Of emotion...
Of love...
Until all that is left is a faint shadow.
A weak outline of the person you once were-a person you are certain you will never see again.
It leaves you a walking corpse
Only full of its poison.
Depression leaves you when it ends you...
Dead on the inside.
Wishing you could commit fully to that peaceful darkness...
That blissful emptiness...
But no.
Your stubborn body trudges on despite the urges of your poison-filled brain to
Just.
End.
It.
Depression creeps up on you slowly and when it attacks it sinks its sharp claws so far into you they become a part of you
Something that's always been there.
For surely you've never really felt happy...
Never really been loved...
They don't want you.
In fact, they can't stand to talk to you.
Is that the depression talking?
Or is it me...
I can't tell the difference anymore...
We are one and the same.