Tempted (#Wattys2015)

Tempted:36:

*Bella*
Sunday:

"You alright?" Justin asked me, looking at me from the rear view mirror.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I nodded my head, glancing at him before I looked back out the window and onto the road, the radio going dead after I did so.

"You've been quiet the whole way up here. Are you sure?"

"Yeah." I nodded once for emphasis, taking his hand as he slid it on my leg.

"You know you can talk to me about it if you want to."

"I know, but I don't want to." I shrugged, his hand giving mine a gentle squeeze as we followed behind Dad's car.

Mine was at home for now. I'd be walking mostly in New York, and I was too afraid of it getting stolen in the middle of the night. I didn't want to bring it here.

Justin turned the radio back on then, I guess to eliminate the quiet in the car, because I honestly didn't feel like smiling at the moment - and this was supposed to be something exciting.

"So tomorrow morning are we going to drag our butts out of bed and go get some Starbucks?"

"If you want to."

"Bella, this is for you. We'll do whatever you want while I'm here."

"God I'm being such a bitch." I mumbled, resting my head in my palm against the car door.

"No, I get why you're upset, but you're not a bitch."

"I'm being one."

"No."

"Yes."

He sighed again, no longer arguing with me, which I was kind of happy about.

He had just been agreeing with me all the time...I wasn't going to complain about that.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, and when I saw it was Jackie I picked up, looking at our car in front of us.

"Hey, your dad wants to know if you guys are hungry yet. We were thinking about stopping to eat."

"Yeah, sure, hold on," I lifted the phone from my ear, turning to Justin. "Do you want to stop to eat?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Yeah, we can stop."

"Ok. There's a McDonald's up here that we can go to."

"Sounds fine. I'll see you then." I hung up, letting the phone fall back in my lap, remembering Justin's hand holding mine.

Once again silence filled the car, and even after we were in the parking lot we were quiet. I guess he didn't know what to say as much as I didn't.

But when we walked inside and saw my brother, Jackie and my dad, we stood in line with them, and I let myself hug Justin's waist, feeling his arm drape over my shoulders while he kissed the top of my head.

"What do you want?"

"Chicken nuggets." I said with a chuckle, feeling his laughter from the vibration of his chest.

"I figured."

"Oh stop, you want the same thing."

"Yes, I do." He kissed the side of my head, keeping an arm around my shoulders while walking a little more in line.

Once again, I had a lot going on in my head.
_______________


6:12 PM

"Bye." I whispered, hugging onto Jackie as tightly as I could, then my brother, and lastly my dad.

"Bye. I'll call you and see how things are later, ok?"

"Ok." I nodded, smiling weakly as he kissed my forehead and felt Justin rest his hand in the small of my back, crossing my arms over my chest. "I love you."

"I love you too."

Josh smiled at me, nodding his head at Justin before disappearing on the other side of the door of my apartment.

There were so many things I was feeling right now, too many emotions to even express how i felt all in the same moment.

They were gone.

"Come on," Justin said, pulling me over to the couch and down on his lap. "What do you want for dinner?"

"I don't know. I haven't really thought about it."

"Chinese?" He smiled against my cheek, kissing it sweetly a few times.

"Sure, that sounds good. We can share something if you want. I'm not that hungry."

"Alright." He nodded, but instead of letting him get up again, I curled up into his chest, closing my eyes as his arms encircled all the way around my waist. "What's wrong? Please talk to me."

"It's just the same thing as before. I'll be ok, I just need to get used to it."

"You know you're safe here."

"Am I?"

"Bella, you're away from all of the shit at home and you don't have to worry about Manny watching your back all the time or anyone of them popping out of the blue. You're away from it."

"But I'll still act on it. I'm not going to feel different."

"I think you will eventually." His lips pressed against my forehead, the back of his hand caressing my head. "But I'm going to be able to keep a better eye on things back home."

"But you have school...your mom..."

"Yeah, but I'll be ok. I'm used to having a lot on my plate with this sort of thing. It used to be my daily life."

"It's not anymore though, that's my point."

"It's ok. Don't worry. I'll be fine, and this way I know you're safe."

"I'll call you every night."

"Every night huh?"

"Yes. We can talk to each other until we fall asleep, this way we never sleep alone."

"You refuse to let me call you cute, and yet you are, so much." I giggled, pecking his lips a few times gently.

"Yeah, yeah, so I'm told."

"Look," I laughed again, squeezing his cheeks together. "Cutie pie."

"Ew."

"You love it."

"Let's go out."

"Ok, fine, make me get up." I grumbled, standing up off of him and fixed my shorts.

"We're right by Central Park, then we can come back and get dinner."

"I feel like you are enjoying it here more than me."

"I plan on having a nice time with my girlfriend, even if it means forcing a smile on your face."

"You're not!" I grabbed my keys off the counter, laughing as he came up behind me and hugged my waist. "It's a real smile."

"Good."

The smile he gave me sent butterflies roaring through my stomach, laughing again once I had turned around in his arms and held onto the base of his neck, unhesitant to press my lips against his.

"If we keep this up we'll never get outside." He mumbled along my lips, peeking one eye open.

"You think I care about that? It's really not that hard to be perfectly content kissing you with nothing else to really worry about."

"Hmmm, well in that case..." I squealed as he lifted me up on the counter, his hands hooking my legs around his torso while my arms snaked their way around his neck. "You know...Jackie and you making your bed earlier was probably a waste of time."

"Justin!" I flushed, burying my face in his neck while his hands slowly moved back and forth along my legs.

"Oh please, you were thinking the same thing as I was, and it's just us."

"Maybe I wasn't."

"But you were." He chuckled again, pecking my cheek while sliding his hands up to my hips. "And even if you weren't, I could easily fix that."

"How so?"

"You already know how." A mischievous grin curled along his lips, his hand firmly pressing into my back to push my closer.

I closed my eyes, his lips skimming my neck for just a minute, a shiver threatening to creep up, but it never did.

For someone that had been in a bad mood earlier, I sure as hell was in a good mood now.

I wasn't afraid to make it known, and he probably knew that by the way I let my hands fall down his chest and sneak under his shirt, letting my palms absorb every indentation.

Oh but that sweet spot, he found it all right.

He always freaking did.

______________________________

*Justin*

8:48 PM

I felt a pang of guilt every time she smiled - at least at first. It was slowly fading now, along with that little voice in my head that kept telling me to talk to her.

I knew she'd just be mad at me, she' d be upset, and she didn't need that now.

I looked down at her curled against my chest, hugging her body closer to mine.

She fell asleep as soon as we had finished eating, not that I was surprised.


I adjusted her so I could scoop her up in my arms, hers wrapping around my neck unconsciously before I laid her down.

"Where are you going?" She mumbled, peeking an eye open.

"No where." I chuckled, kissing her forehead. "Go back to sleep."

"Lay down with me." I rolled my eyes, but scooted in next to her anyway, pulling her closer by her waist. "I feel like it's too early to be sleeping."

"We've had a long day. It's alright. I'm tired too."

But I knew I wouldn't be sleeping. All I had been doing today was thinking, and I still would be.

I had to keep myself from falling back into everything, but I wanted to. Maybe not Manny, but I needed the ability to forget everything again.

She's not going to be around, I'd have to sober up around my parents and Jazzy and Jaxon, but other than that I could get away with it.

No you can't. They caught what you were doing once and you lost everything.

I watched her closely through the dark, slowly moving my hand along her arm, then eventually took her hand, and by the way she didn't move at all when I did that, I knew she had fallen back asleep.

I hugged her tighter to me anyway, nuzzling my face into her neck, squeezing my eyes shut.

I knew she'd be happy here. Maybe not right away, but soon it would all kick in.

I couldn't even imagine her face when I left...when it finally sunk in...being all alone again.

I sighed, once again hugging her body tighter and squeezed my eyes shut, making sure I took in the smell of he hair every time I inhaled.

I knew leaving was going to kill me too, after all, she wasn't the only one that would be alone.

______________

2:43 AM

"What's wrong?" I asked Bella, reaching out groggily for her hand as she sat up, quickly wiping her eyes.

"Bad dream. I'm fine."

"Bella...please tell me what's wrong. Is it still this thing? New York?"

"No, it was Manny stuff. I'm fine."

"Come here," I mumbled, wrapping my arms around her waist and pulled her back into my chest. "What happened?"

"It was just an altered version of what has happened...you know..."

"I hate it when you cry...especially when I can't do anything."

"It's not your fault. I'm fine."

I tilted my head down enough to kiss her forehead, repeating a few times until she relaxed back into me, slowly stroking her hair.

"Well you know Christian isn't around anymore, and I have a feeling Manny won't be soon either."

"Justin you can't take care of him. So many people will know he's missing, then they find you as a suspect and you're in jail the rest of your life from murder. No."

"I never said I was doing it."

"You didn't have to. I know you were thinking it."

"But I won't. I would love to, but I can't. I know I can't."

"Hunter and Mike can't either. You'd go right down with them, Jackie - I just...I don't know."

"If anything, his enemies is what kills him Bella, not us."

"But what if he comes after you like he intended last time..."

"Then I'm ready for him. I'm going to do whatever I have to do to keep you safe."

"It's going to be weird without you."

"Yeah, it'll be weird without you being home too, but we'll be ok. You should go back to sleep."

"I'm not that tired anymore." She said into my chest, somehow managing to nuzzle her face deeper.

"And then in the morning you'll be exhausted. We're going out to do things."

"I'll be fine. I don't like sleeping anymore."

"Story of my life."

"You sound tired." She giggled a little, lifting up her head and pressed her lips against mine in a soft kiss.

"If you keep doing that then we'll have a problem."

"I didn't realize this was a bad thing."

"Oh it can be."

"Why?" She tilted her head to the side, sliding one leg to the other side of my torso.

"This is why." I groaned, sliding my hands to her hips. "Because you kill me."

"You do the same exact thing." She leaned down, tucking her hair behind her ear before pecking my lips.

"That's true."

"My point exactly."

"You know, sometimes you really do wake up weirdly."

"I know." Bella laid back down then, sighing as our hands intertwined under the sheets. "A wave of sleep came and hit me again."

"It never left me."

"You didn't wake up from your near death experience."

"I have."

"Yeah...I know..."

I sighed this time, pecking her forehead and shut my eyes while hugging her waist.

___________________________________

*Bella*

"It's so pretty out." I told Justin as he handed me my coffee, pecking his cheek.

"It sure is." He smiled, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

"Thank you."

"You're very welcome."

I took a sip, walking with him as he led me through the city.

"Justin, where are we going?"

"You'll see."

"Why do you do that?" I groaned, watching as the grin widened on his face.

"Because I can."

"You know how I feel about surpises."

"But you always love mine. You think I'd really take you to something I didn't think you'd like?"

"No..."

"Exactly. I have things planned that I've been working on so you had a nice time."

"Oh really?"

"Yes really. You'll love it. We're not too far."

"Do I get a hint?"

"No." He shook his head, turning his head to look for cars before we crossed the street.

"Fine, be like that."

"It'll give it away!"

"Whatever you say." I teased with an eyeroll, but saw him swallow. "Justin...I'm kidding..."

"I know, sorry."

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." He shrugged as we rounded the corner, pulling us right towards a sign to the zoo.

"Are you taking me to the zoo?"

"Maybe."

"Aw! Justin!"

"I told you that you'd like it."

"Will you let me take pictures?"

"Yes, you can take pictures."

"I want to cover the wall by my bed slowly. I have a few from us this summer that I want to put up. I got them developed before we left."

"I can help you put them up when we get back tonight."

"Ok." I smiled up at him, fixing the loose tank top I wore and tossed my now empty coffee cup in the trash, feeling Justin take my hand from my side.

"So, what do you want to see first?"

"It doesn't matter to me. As long as we the turtles and monkeys at some point."

"Done." He kissed the side of my head, pulling out a piar of tickets from his pocket.

___________________________

2:39 PM

"I think I would be pretty content with swimming all day." I told Justin, standing as close as I could to the glass by the turtles.

"I took a picture of you." He chuckled, holding out his phone to show me the picture.

"Ew, look at my face." I cringed, trying to snatch the phone from his hand so I could delete the picture.

"Oh stop it, you're beautiful." I immediatley blushed, giggling as he came up behind me and started planting kisses on my cheek. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"I think those turtles are friends." He told me, pointing back to the one that had been in front of my face a few seconds ago as it swam around with another one.

"Wouldn't they have to be? They're kinda stuck together."

"What would you do if you were stuck with me like that?"

"That's a very good question."

"I'm serious though, what would you do?"

"I don't know, I think I'd be pretty happy with you around all the time."

"Really?"

"Of course." I nodded, turning my head to look back at him. "What do you think?"

"I think that I would be the happiest turtle on earth to be stuck with someone like you."

"I'm touched." I teased again, holding my hand over my heart.

"Good thing we're not turtles. We'd have to eat fish."

"You're a dork."

"But you love me, and as long as you love me that's all that matters."

"You're so cute." I turned around, laughing as I hugged him. "What am I going to do without hearing things like that everyday?"

"I don't know what I'm going to do without seeing your face after I say them everyday."

I had been the one keeping the mood light, but he was so serious when he spoke that I wasn't really smiling anymore.

"What do you want to see next?" I asked, breaking the silence and took his hand, pulling him away from the exhibit.

"Whatever you want."

"No, you can choose too."

"Bella, it's alright. I've seen a lot of what I wanted to see anyway."

"Justin, I really don't want this to be a thing where we just pity me...I mean...I feel bad because I feel like all I've done is complain, and I'm just really happy you're here with me."

"No, it's ok. It's a big step in your life, in both of our lives...and long distance is going to be something new to us, but I'm willing to try anything for you, and you know the last thing I want to do is lose you. I want to make you happy."

"You do make me happy." I gave his hand a reassuring squeeze, kissing his cheek.

"And that's what I plan on doing as long as I'm here."

"You are! But thank you...I know you have a lot going on with your mom and everything too."

"I called her this morning while you were in the shower. She's doing just fine today, and Dad was going over. I'm relaxing a bit. It's a nice break from reality."

"At least until Wednesday."

We stayed quiet for a minute, the only sound a rock beneath Justin's foot as he kicked it ahead of us.

"Hey look, can we stop by the giraffe's? I bet one has the name of Melman."

"Ok." He chortled, swinging our hands as we made our way down a path once again.

Let's just hope we chose the right one.

______________

ALRIGHT GUYS! I have an explanation for no update last week. As you all know this musical has been killer on me, and last week was just full of a lot of drama and tears. It was really rough for me personally, and I was honestly so close to losing a friend, that friend being my crush. Long story short him and I are just friends, and he's one of my closest, everything is fine now and I feel like the luckiest girl on earth to even be able to call him that.

So I apologize from the bottom of my heart and I know most of you get where I'm coming from.

SO ANYWAY THINGS ARE ABOUT TO GET ROUGH HERE FOR THEM AND I REALLY REALLY HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT. If you have any predictions, ideas, or thoughts in general please comment ;) I'll be up tonight and I'll try to reply!
Love you!

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