Tempted (#Wattys2015)

Tempted:53:

*Bella*

Thursday:
1:43 PM

I now sat in my music composition class, trying to focus as my professor went over the different styles of music.

"I really want to encourage you guys to step out of your comfort zone with your next piece, and make sure you really put yourself into your piece, whether it's tapping into certain emotions you're feeling now, or just a way of expressing yourself. You are all now free to start. That's all I have for today."

I gathered my books, hugging them to my chest and glanced up again, only to find Trent looking at me, then away.

He had texted me a few times this week, trying to talk to me, he even called once Sunday while Justin was still over, but I let the phone ring while we were eating breakfast, and saw it was Trent later.

I felt awful...I know I had hurt him...I just couldn't do it anymore.

I couldn't lie to Justin like that.

Did it make me an awful person? To just ignore Trent like that? He wanted more from me, even if 'just friends' was an options- that's all it was supposed to be before and he kissed me.

I was in love with Justin. I was so in love with him. Being friends with Trent hurt him...and I didn't want to do that.

I'd rather hurt Trent then Justin...it wasn't worth losing him over.

And I felt awful...But Justin was right, I knew it was wrong, and I didn't have feeling for Trent that way. If I kept hanging out with him, I'd just end up feeling all tis guilt, Justin would find out, and I didn't even know where that would lead when he found out.

We were so good right now...besides us fighting last week...it had seemed like it was straight out of a book.

He was so sweet, and even he seemed to have a good time - I hope he did...he seemed to...

He laughed when I got a Shirley Temple...and teased me that I had cried...but I know that he was thinking the same thing, he was just better at hiding it then I was.

The fact that he had been listening when I was talking to Rachel said a lot, that he was trying to make me happy - and he had. I wanted him to be happy too...

For Christmas I had gotten him a personalized dog tag with our names engraved on it, and then our anniversary date is...

I wonder if he even knew that.

But I got us tickets for a basketball game up here too, a Knicks game. I knew he would like that.

That and I got him a few shirts and stuff - based on everything I'd seen him in and the shirts I had managed to keep here.

Hopefully he'd like them...

I was excited for Christmas...for Justin to come over and eat with us...I'd never had a boyfriend over holidays really...plus nobody was him...

But I was going to see him tomorrow-at home. Since he couldn't come here, I would go to him.

He didn't know, I wanted to surprise him too...plus I missed home.

I quickly ducked into the room with the Grand Piano, locking the door behind me.

I had been working on a song for a while now...things that I needed to put together.

I was going to use that for my assignment.

I pulled out my notebook, flipping through it until I found lyrics I had written and played around with some chords.