Rapid Days Behind the Bars of Life

Chapter 11

It's 6:00 am and I'm outside smoking.

In all honesty, I wasn't only pissed that Kaiwa wouldn't tell me who the father of the baby is but I was also pissed at the fact that she had sex with someone else and got pregnant by that person. I thought she was only having sex with me because I was only having sex with her. I was loyal with that.

I need to know who the father is, so I called her.

"Jonah, hey," She said.

"Who's the father?" I asked straight forwardly.

She sighed

"Kaiwa, it's 6:35 am, I haven't slept because I've been thinking about it and I've smoked three cigarettes to try to calm me down but it seems I can't calm down until I know. So Kaiwa I'm going to ask again, who is the father?" I said firmly and with frustration in my voice.

"Okay, I think it's time you know anyway can we meet up, I don't want to talk about this over the phone."

We met up at the park by her house.

She hugged me and kissed me on the lips.

"Kaiwa I told you, no more of that."

"Yea, but she doesn't have to know. What she doesn't see or know, won't hurt her."

"I'm not going to cheat on her like you cheated on me."

"Cheated on you? Um excuse me, we were never a thing, like you said we were friends with benefits."

"Yea but, we agreed on only having sex with each other, but you had sex with someone else who got you pregnant and I want to know who it was."

"No, you agreed on only having sex with each other, I never agreed to that." She said, getting frustrated.

"Who was it?" I said angrily

"It was Shameik okay!" She yelled angrily.

I didn't say anything, I couldn't say anything. My eyes got watery and my throat felt compressed.

"It was Shamiek, he's the father of the baby." She said in a calmer and lower voice.

"So you cheated on me with my best friend." I said, looking straight into her eyes with my teary eyes.

"Listen Jonah, I didn't cheat on you. We were never a thing and quite frankly, I don't think we ever will be, but since you want to talk like that, you're cheating too, with Jossie or Jo whatever you call her."

"I didn't have sex with her and get her pregnant."

She groaned loudly in frustration.

"How did it happen? No when did it happen?" I asked.

"It was the beginning of the month and we went to your favorite place after we dropped you off at home from the party we went to then we drank some more and got high then I kissed him, and one thing led to another and we had sex."

"I can't believe you, you cheated on me with my best friend in my favorite place," I gave a sarcastic chuckle then said, "could it get any worse than that? Oh wait, it did get worse because you got pregnant!"

She started crying and said, "I'm sorry Jonah, I really am." she was staring right into my eyes.

I couldn't take it. I was beyond pissed. I wanted to slap her and punch Shameik  till he bled out, so I just walked away.

"No, Jonah don't leave me I need you, I'm sorry I'm so sorry." She said in a teary voice and was tugging on to my shirt as I was walking away but I pulled away.

I didn't turn around as I left, I didn't want to see her crying even though I could hear her. It hurt to hear her cry, it'll only make it worse to see her crying so I started running.

I ran so I could feel the physical pain of my lungs running out of air, of my thigh muscles stiffening, of my feet burning. This way it would take away the emotional pain even if it was just for a moment.

I ran to Shameik's house, yelling his name for him to come out. He did.

"What's going on? Why do you look like you died and came back to haunt me?" He said laughing.

That made me even more angry so I pushed him.

"Dude what the fuck?" he said, confused and serious.

"Did you know?"

"Did I know what? You're kind of scaring me, how many pills did you take?" He said trying to touch me,

I moved back and said, "I didn't take any pills dick face. Did you know that you're the father?"

He didn't say anything.

"Did you fucking know!" I yelled with every bit of anger I have in me.

"Yes! yea Jonah, I knew."

I laughed but not because anything was funny but because I was so angry that I  didn't even know what to feel anymore.

"What's so funny?" He asked, with a frown.

"So that's what the incident in the football field was all about." I said in a calm voice, not that I was calm though.

"Yea, that's why I acted like that, I didn't know what to feel about becoming a father, I couldn't handle knowing. I can't handle knowing that I'm going to be a father because I'm so scared that I'll be like my father."

"Really? That's what you're scared about? That you'll become like your father? You have the power to control that, you can either be like your father or be better than your father."

"Yea, you're right thanks."

"No, fucker don't thank me. You've known for that long and you just didn't think to tell me? You lied to me that you didn't know why Kaiwa wasn't in school when I asked you. You fucking lied to me. I want to punch you so bad right now."

"I know, I'm sorry."

"You're sorry huh? She's mine! Kaiwa is mine! You knew that but you still went ahead and fucked her. What about Kody huh? Remember Kody your girlfriend?" I was shaking with anger.

"I told her, and she broke up with me but dude, Kaiwa is not yours, she never was. She doesn't belong to you or me, she's not some property she's a human being and quite frankly, she can fuck whoever she wants to fuck and she wanted to fuck me so deal with it." 

"I cannot believe you just said that to me. I should fucking deal with it? Well, deal with raising a baby and being a father, deal with Kaiwa and her parents from hell and deal with me breaking up our friendship as well."

He became teary eyed and said, "Dude-" he chocked because he was trying to hold back his tears and he couldn't continue speaking.

I wasn't trying to hold back my tears, or my feelings I poured it all out and I left.

"Fuck you Jonah! Fuck you!" He cried out.

Well, at least he managed to let that out.