Damian and Mar'i Demonfire

First Kiss (Part 1) - in Damian's POV

Mar'i had been shot.  And it had all been my fault.  We had been on patrol, and saw three men who were about to gang rape a young woman.  In the chaos of the fighting, one of the men had pulled out a gun and shot Mar'i in the torso, chest, and leg.  She fell unconscious from the wounds. Once she had been shot, in a rage, I kicked and beat the bastards until they were bloody, bruised, and unconscious.  The woman had gotten away during the fight.

Immediately, I called Nightwing and Batman, and while waiting for them to arrive, I applied pressure to Mar'i's bullet wounds, hoping she wouldn't die.  Finally, Grayson and father had arrived.  Father took the men to jail, while Grayson and I quickly rushed Mar'i to the Gotham Hospital in the batmobile.  Now, I was sitting in a chair in a hospital room, with Mar'i unconscious on the bed.  The doctor and nurses tending to Mar'i's wounds were trusted associates of Leslie Thompkins. Our secret identities should be safe from them.

The doctor said that he and the nurses had removed the bullets, and that thankfully the bullet in her chest had avoided her heart.  But the wounds in her stomach and chest were still rather severe.  Also, her human/Tamaranean hybrid body made the treatment more difficult for them, as they had never worked on an alien hybrid before.  They didn't know if she would live.

Father, Drake, Cain, Brown, and Grayson had already visited.  Even Gordon had Face Timed with us to check on Mar'i, since she was confined to her wheelchair back at her apartment.  Grayson had stayed with Mar'i for quite a while, pale faced while holding her hand.  I had stayed with Mar'i for eight hours ever since the doctor had allowed visitors to see her.  In her unconsciousness, Mar'i looked very pale, which wasn't at all like her usually tan, radiant skin.  Her raven-black hair was splayed across her pillow, like spilt ink.  Her eyes were shut, giving the appearance of sleep.  All of her bullet wounds were bandaged, but that didn't stop some of the blood from showing through them.

Part of me felt exhausted for having stayed about eight hours with Mar'i after she was shot.  I had refused to go to back to my apartment to change out of my Robin uniform. Part of my me felt extremely guilty for not being able to save her from the bullets.  Part of me felt angry with myself and the men, who were responsible for getting Mar'i shot in the first place.  Part of me felt incredibly worried for Mar'i, as her wounds were possibly fatal, and I just could not lose her.

Wait, did I just say I could not lose her?

Wayne, you emotional idiot.

I have always seen Mar'i as an ally, a bat family partner.  I have never had romantic feelings for anyone.  But looking at Mar'i simply made my heart leap, and fill with dread.  Seeing her unconscious made my chest twist with not knowing if she would live.

But even before she had been shot, I have always worried for her.  And not in the way I would've worried for a friend, but I would always feel extremely protective and worried for her.  Whenever we were simply talking of spending time together as friends, she would always make me feel, well, whole after.

And her laugh and smile, just warmed every fiber in my body.  I already knew that there could be a small possibility of romantic feelings for Mar'i, but seeing her shot made me realize something.

I did not have a simple infatuation with Mar'i.

I loved her.

This thought made me extremely happy yet extremely sad too.  Happy, because I have never felt for anyone this way before, and these feelings made me feel rather hopeful.  Sad, because if Mar'i died, I would ever be the same again.  And even if Mar'i did live, I doubted that she would feel the same for me, or if Grayson would ever approve of such a relationship.  I could not reveal these feelings to anyone, especially Mar'i.

"Damian?"  I turn and see Mar'i, awake from her unconsciousness, although she still looks very weak.

I rush to her bedside and kneel beside her. Out of relief, I grasp her right hand with my hands, and she doesn't pull it away.

"Mar'i."

All of the anger and exhaustion that had been building up inside of me immediately disappeared.  I was too relieved to see Mar'i finally awake.  Suddenly, my guilt kicks in to ruin my relief.

"It is my fault that you got shot."

I cannot look at her, so I stare down at the floor. "I saw the gun but I did not have time to disarm the gunman. I could have stepped in the bullet's path but... I did not. I am sorry."

"Wha-?" Mar'i looks rather confused, but then her confusion is suddenly replaced with surprising anger.

"Damian, don't you dare apologize for something you couldn't stop!"

She sounds as angry as she looks.  Despite my mind warning me to remain cautious, relief floods through me again. You fool.

"Thank you Mar'i," My voice comes out rather quietly.  I might regret saying those words. However, to my relief, Mar'i simply smiles.

"X'hal Damian, I don't want you getting hurt."

What she just said makes us both go quiet.  Even though that is an entirely platonic thing to say, i suddenly feel dizzy with a fierce rush of relief and joy.  I look straight into her bright green eyes, and she looks straight at me.  Even though she is weak from her wounds, her eyes are bright with fire.

"Damian," she whispers.

"Mar'i," I say back quietly.

I do not know who initiated it first, but suddenly we are kissing each other.

I am a fool.

I do not know what in hell I was thinking. I have never been the type of person who analyzes these sort of things.  I had never kissed anyone before.  And before this kiss, Mar'i and I had never been anything more than friends, or allies.  We had never gone on a date together, let alone kiss.  But kissing Mar'i just felt, incredibly wonderful.  Intoxicating, even.  It was as if a warm fire had been set throughout my body, and did not have any intention to stop burning.  And neither of us seemed like we wanted to stop.  I could get lost in this feeling.

But then, I suddenly remember Grayson, and how he would never approve of us dating each other.  And Mar'i had probably only kissed me rashly in pain from her wounds.  My emotions were taking over my mind. This is a bad idea.  An impulsive heat of the moment decision.  Unhealthy.

Immediately, I quickly turn away my head from Mar'i, breaking the kiss. I still hold onto her hand.  I need this contact with her, to keep awake.  God, she is beautiful.

"We shouldn't," I say quietly, even though I want to kiss her more.  World, you are cruel to me.

"I know," Mar'i says sadly.  "But I feel like we should."

As do I, I think to myself, but I don't say this aloud.  I let go of her hand and leave the room to inform the doctor and the bat family that Mar'i is awake now.  I walk down the hallway, very confused on what had just happened.