WARNING: Self Harm and Divorce
Okay, let me just grab some stuff from my house and I'll be right over." I said as I waved to Melanie and Mrs. Martinez.
Before I knew what I was doing, I ran to my bathroom and picked up a razor blade.
"God. Damn. You. Josh." With every word, I created a new, beautiful line. Watching the blood run through the slit was so calming. I'd pay the price of hurting myself later. It didn't matter at the moment.
Knock. I knocked on the huge door of Melanie's house. It was a Victorian Era sort of house, with a grand double door and huge windows. It was a faded pink color with a white trim, and matched Melanie's personality perfectly.
The door swung open. "Hey there, Melanie." I waved. After realizing the sleeve on my hoodie moved around, I quickly pulled them down past my hands, trying not to make it obvious as to what I was trying to hide.
I stepped through the entrance, and was greeted by Mrs. Martinez. I smiled and walked upstairs to put my stuff in the spare bedroom. It was originally Mr. Martinez's room, but he left with another woman years ago.
"C'mon, Ty! Let's go outside and dance to some music! I put up fairy lights in the trees!" I winced as Melanie grabbed my arm, and she immediately stopped to look at me.
"We'll talk outside." Her voice was serious. I didn't want her to find out what I did before I got here, but now, I'm fucked.
"When did you do it? Let me see. Are they fresh?" She pulled my hoodie off before I could react, and I squealed when my arms slid through.
"Oh shit, you did this before you got here didn't you?" I nodded, tears in my eyes.
Melanie hugged me, and I buried her face in my shoulder.
"I'm too fucking attached to Josh, that's why I did it. It's because I know that if he ever leaves me, I won't be able to live on my own. I'll have to face reality without him." I sipped the wine that Melanie gave me. Her mom was so carefree. She didn't care that she had just given two underage teenagers a bottle of alcohol, but I was grateful for it at the moment.
We downed an entire bottle of wine, and maybe even a second one. I couldn't tell for sure, but I was sure of one thing. I was drunk. It didn't take much for me to get drunk either.
I sat down, and was surprised when Melanie straddled me and pressed her lips to mine. Completely forgetting that I was gay, I kissed back. She got up and lead me to her room.
I pushed her onto the bed and snuck my tongue into her mouth. Soon enough, clothes were flying everywhere, and the rest of the night was a blur.
-
I heard my phone vibrate and immediately picked it up.
New message from: Josh Dun
Josh: Babe? Where are you?
Sent: 4:00 pm
Josh: Tyler? I got the song, I really like it
Sent: 4:27 pm
Josh: i got my phone taken away, plz dont think i was ignoring u
Sent: 4:45 pm
Josh: r u still staying at my place 2nite?
Sent: 5:13 pm
Josh: hey, plz pick up your phone
Sent: 7:00 pm
Josh: Goddammit Ty, ur killing me
Sent: 9:48 pm
Josh: Morning babe, plz answer me
Sent: 7:14 am
Read: 7:30 am
I decided to text him back. I had a lot of questions for Josh.
Tyler: I'm at Melanie's house. I stayed the the night bc no one answered the door at ur house. Where were u? I fucking relapsed again. I need u. Why didn't u answer when I knocked on the door?
Sent: 7:32 am
Read: 7:33 am
I waited for a response.
Josh: My parents saw that you were at the door and wouldn't even let me give you ur stuff. And im so sorry you relapsed, id be with you right now if i had the choice. In fact, do u want me to try to sneak out to Mel's house rn?
Sent: 7:34 am
Read: 7:34 am
Dammit, Josh.
Tyler: sure, just dont get caught plz
Sent: 7:34 am
Read: 7:34 am
I got up out of my bed, only to realize that it wasn't my bed. I looked to my left. Shit. Melanie was laying there naked, and I was too. What happened last night?
I rushed to get dressed and went down to the living room. Mrs. Martinez was at a teacher conference this morning. I had no idea that it was already Saturday, but Josh was still grounded until tonight, so he had to be careful sneaking out.
I heard a soft knock on the door and saw that it was Josh. I swung open the door and threw my arms around Josh, whining at how much my arms hurt when I did that. I sobbed into Josh's shoulder.
"Ty, babe. Let's talk inside." He sat me down on the couch.
"I thought you left me and when no one answered the door at your place, I went back to my house and my mom was being an asshole and I couldn't take it anymore and it just happened." I couldn't tell Josh about the possibility of Melanie and I having sex. No, not yet at least.
"Oh fuck, Ty. Babe, I'd never leave you."
"I thought you could have k- kill-" I collapsed into Josh's arms, not able to bear the thought of seeing Josh for the last time at his own funeral.
"No no no, don't- don't think like that. I'd never do that to you. I care about you way too much, and don't you forget that." Josh was crying as well now. In fact, I was bawling my eyes out. We must have woken Melanie up too, because she came down with a concerned look on her face.
"Uh, Josh. I think we should leave now." I grabbed his arm and ran out the door. I didn't know were we were going, but I lead us into the woods.
"Did you guys get into a fight or something? Why'd you leave so quickly when you saw Melanie?" I had to tell him. I couldn't hold it in any longer.
"Josh, I think I may have made a huge mistake last night. Let's just say I woke up naked, next to a naked Melanie, and couldn't remember anything that happened last night." I blurted out.
"B-but Tyler, you're gay."
"I know. That's why I'm so confused. Was I really that drunk?"
"Actually, I'm not concerned about how gay you are, or how drunk you were, I'm more concerned for Melanie. You probably didn't use protection." Josh stated.
"Fuck fuck fuck fuck."
"Language, young man." I knew he was just joking, but I wasn't in the mood.
"Josh,"
"Yeah?"
"Help me."
