Here Is All I Have

e i g h t

the next day Peter stops me in the hall. "hey, did you have fun last night? I definitely did. why didn't you meet Zoe and I for coffee like I asked?"

"because I don't want to know Zoe. if you do, you can leave me for her. I'm not good at sharing you, I'm sorry," I thought I'd cried enough last night, but here I go again.

"okay, I'll stop bringing her around you, chill out. I don't know why it's such a big deal to you. you need to learn how to be calm, like Zoe is."

"obviously Zoe is much better for you." I say, turning around to walk to class. later, he will apologize and we can return to the regularly scheduled program. for now, though, I'm pissed.

I'm back to class with Alaine, having not heard from her since I left class yesterday.

"Arabella," she starts with my full name. this won't be good. as I step closer, I see her makeup is smeared and running, there are bags under her eyes. our fight didn't do this to her. so what did?

"Babe, what's going on?" I say as I pull her in for a hug.

"Bella, I'm so sorry," is all she says. what the hell happened?

"what happened?" I ask. she sniffles and releases my body from a tight hug.

"can you skip class today?"

"I suppose," I say, still so confused. she leads me out of the school, and we make it to her car.

"Alaine. what has you so sad?" I attempt to wipe a tear from her face but she looks away from me. "Alaine?"

"let me finish my story before you get angry, okay?" she asks. "please."

"alright, just tell me."

"Peter came to my room last night, saying you'd cheated on him and he was so sad. he was crying and shaking, I couldn't console him. and I'm not angry with you for cheating on him, he's done horrible things to you, but you really hurt him. I mean, he's a fucking mess, Ara-"

I interrupt her to ask her something. "when did he come over?"

"around eleven last night,"

that was just after he left the restaurant without me. oh god. oh, god. we got to the dorms thirty minutes after he did.

"anyway, um... he wanted to show me proof of you cheating. we went to his room..."

"oh, fuck!" I scream, banging on the dashboard with a fist. she fucked him last night, not Zoe.

"listen Ara, please!" she has tears in her eyes too.

"go on."

"there was a picture of you with that asshole Michael. don't lie, it was legit. your legs were wrapped around his body and his hand was on your ass. I couldn't believe it. he kept on crying, sobbing. he was breaking, I could tell. then we heard you walk into his room.. we heard everything. he went into panic mode, he wanted to hurt you. he asked me to fuck him, and be loud and obnoxious so you would hear. I didn't want to hurt you, but you hurt him so bad. so I did it, I did him. and I really loved it. and I feel horrible but I don't want to stop fucking him, so I was hoping we could come to some sort of agreement. please." she actually has the nerve to be crying right now.

I hop out of the car and instantly stick my pocket knife into the car door. I leave a huge gash and she's screaming inside the car when I walk away. maybe that was too much, but I don't care right now. I'm so angry.

I immediately go on a search for Peter. to think, all of this has happened and it's only 10:30 AM. his first class starts ten minutes after mine. I have no idea if he even went, he typically finds better things to do. like fuck random girls.

as I'm walking back into the building, I see a familiar face through my tears.

"Bella, what's going on?" Trevor asks. he's the best friend I could ask for. far better than Alaine. that backstabbing bitch.

he's a chubby guy, but he's strong and plays every sport I've ever heard of. even volleyball, and tennis. his boyfriend, Tanner, is the complete opposite. he hasn't played a sport in his life, and he never wants to. they're the cutest couple I've ever seen. they've been together since sixth grade, believe it or not, and they're in their last year of college now. when they leave, I'll really miss them.

Trevor pulls me into a hug and smooths my hair down to make me calm. "what happened, lover?"

"Alaine hooked up with Peter," I manage to say through muffled sobs.

"what? assholes..." Trevor doesn't know Peter used to hurt me. I felt as if he would never be okay with him if he knew of our past. Trevor is protective, and he would kill Peter for ever being abusive.

"she asked me if she could keep fucking him, too."

"oh my god. I'll kill them both."

"really, it's just Peter. he tricked her into thinking I cheated on him and she was revenge sex."

he releases me from our hug and looks at me. "you really know how to pick them, girl." he jokes, eyes still sad and sympathetic. "it's gonna be okay. you don't need them anymore."

"I need him. I always have."

"no, baby. you don't need him. all you need is yourself, and maybe a martini or eleven." he takes my hand and places the fake ID he promised me last week.

"thank you."

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AU-
this chapter is so short, I'm sorry! I'm having minor writers block and I don't love the way this story is going. I might try to finish it up in maybe, five to ten more chapters. if we make it to the ending, you'll be absolutely shocked. ❤️