(holding a gun does not reduce the fear of being shot.)
troye is sitting on the edge of his bed.
connor lies next to him.
(our breathing is so loud.)
"what's x when 11+3x-7=6x+5-3x?"
(what am i when you and i are nothing?)
"no solution, i think."
(i become nothing.)
troye scratches the answer onto his paper.
connor sits up.
(i am nothing without this; i cannot lose this.)
troye lies down, arms back, math worksheet on his lap, eyes to the ceiling, to the sky.
(but right now, i do not even have this.)
connor lies down, arms by his side, completed math worksheet on troye's desk.
(i cannot breathe without you, but you take my breath away when i am with you.)
connor is struggling to breathe. they are too close. he loves the feeling of his hand hitting troye's leg. but they are too close, and connor cannot breathe.
connor turns, facing troye. troye closes his eyes. the stars in the sky on his ceiling are not worth his gaze.
he is so afraid.
connor says, "troye."
troye opens his eyes. the stars are swirling.
troye says, "connor."
(stay with me, baby, i am on my way, i swear.)
connor sits up, and he feels his face glow red. troye closes his eyes. connor wonders why for only a split second. his heart has fallen away and there is a gaping hole in his chest. there is blood and love and wanting and cliffs that plunge into sea green waters and a song that has never been sung and there are unseeable things and there is troye.
(stay with me, baby, because god, have i fallen.)
troye has fallen down this cliff already. he waited for connor.
(and somehow, you are here.)
then connor leans over and presses his lips to troye's.
(when i kissed you, you took away my breath.)
troye's hand touches the back of connor's neck, and it is hesitant. he cannot feel his heart.
(can you still breathe?)
YOU ARE READING
watchful eyes (tronnor)
Fanfictiontroye is in love with connor. connor is not in love with troye. [lowercase intended] [originally titled "the watchful eyes of the lovers and the fools"] [tw: allusions to abuse; homophobia] [COMPLETED]