Panic Attack - H.S. AU

Chapter Eighteen

A/N: just so you know I edited the last chapter a bit so there's some slight changes that I suggest you read :) ... carry on!

-Valerie-

"And then he told me to cut to the part where we told each other we're happy for one another even though we're not," I told Louis, catching him up on the latest drama in my life.

It had been pretty slow at the bar that night and it'd been a while since I'd spoken to Louis. Being around someone that wasn't Zayn, Harry, Niall, or Angie was honestly refreshing. Having him in my life reminded me that I could always take a step back from the drama and pretend like everything is going to be okay.

"So did you do it?" he asked me.

"Do what?"

"Did you tell him you were happy for him?"

I guiltily nodded my head and Louis glared at me distastefully.

"You're an idiot for saying that," he told me.

"He said it too," I tried to defend myself, but we both knew that I was still wrong.

"Listen, I don't really know this Harry guy too well, but I do know that your life has been all over the place ever since he became a part of it."

"We make each other happy," I sincerely told him. "Right when I met him, I knew there was something about him that made me just want to know him."

"How did you two even meet? I don't think you ever told me."

I looked away from Louis. The way Harry and I met was intense and personal. It didn't feel right to tell Louis about it, regardless of the fact that Louis had been bumped up to best friend in my social circle now that Angie was out.

"We met at a coffee shop, cliché I know," I told him.

"You know I can tell when you're lying right?" He chuckled and shook his at me with disappointment. "We've been working together for what, two years? Obviously I've picked up on a thing or two."

"I'm sorry. I know it's weird but I really can't tell you."

"I get it. It's not my business. I won't force you to talk about it." He politely told me. "However, I have a question for you that you're not allowed to avoid."

I grew nervous, but nodded my head anyway.

"Do you think that maybe just maybe you might still be in love with Zayn?"

"No," I said quickly but then Louis gave me that look that said I know you're lying. "I don't know, maybe?" He gave me the same look again causing me to confess the truth. "Look, all I know is that seeing him with Angie made me realize how much I miss him. I miss his bed hair and his laugh. I miss standing by his side with my arm in his looking like an unstoppable power couple. I miss being shown off like I was his world and being praised just for existing. I miss the expensive wine and oh my God I miss the sex. It was just so—"

"Alright, you've made your point." Louis cut me off while laughing. "Now, tell me why you're in love with Harry."

"In love? I don't know about all that. I do know that I care about him though. I mean, he listens to me--like really listens. He allows me to have a voice and understands that I'm going to make mistakes. Plus he's so forgiving and sweet and I know that he's trying. He puts in so much effort for me and I never fail to notice it, but he's not my boyfriend and I can't see us making it official for a while."

"Since I'm clearly a licensed couple's therapy specialist and not a shady bar tender" Louis began, making me laugh. "I obviously have the authority to inform you that you're not in love with Zayn, at least not anymore."