Panic Attack - H.S. AU

Chapter Two

-Valerie-

As Harry and I walked the streets of the city that never sleeps, I decided to ask him a question that had been bothering me the second I saw him standing up on that building.

"I know I shouldn't be asking, but was there any reason why you chose to be on that building?"

Harry, who had been avoiding making any eye contact with me the entire time we'd been walking around, finally looked at me. To my disappointment, he merely shrugged his shoulders and said, "I knew it was high enough to do the job."

"No, that can't be it." I shook my head in disbelief. "I don't mean to push but--"

"But you are. You're pushing," He warned me.

I immediately shut my mouth, understanding that he didn't want to talk about it. I should've known he wouldn't have told me. 

We continued to walk in silence for the next few blocks until Harry randomly stopped in his tracks.

"Shit," He said barely above a whisper. "I can't,"

"Can't what?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

His breathing grew heavy and his hands went to his hair, tugging on his curls. His eyes filled with tears as his hands began to shake.

I knew what was happening.

Harry was having a panic attack.

I grabbed his hand and pulled him into an alley.

"I can't breathe," He said through heavy pants.

"Hey," I whispered. "Look at me."

His eyes widened much like a frightened little boy.

I cupped his face in my hands and softly spoke to him. "It's okay. You're okay. "

He shook his head at me and repeatedly whispered, "No, I'm not."

I decided to use a different tactic. "Harry, count to ten with me."

"But--"

"Just trust me." 

I started off counting at one by myself, but by the time I reached five, Harry was actually counting with me. Thankfully, as soon as we finished, Harry's breathing returned to normal.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I can't control it."

"Don't apologize for that, Harry. Ever."

I wiped away his tears with my thumbs and forced a smile. Unfortunately Harry saw through my ruse. He frowned at me and returned my hands to my sides, clearly not enjoying the affection.

He looked away from me as he said, "Can I ask you a question?"

I nodded my head at him. "Of course."

"How did you know?" He asked me

He had been referring to his panic attack.  Not many people know how to deal with it or really even understand it.

My genuine smile grew weak at the question. I didn't want to answer it because of the memories that came along with the explanation, but I swallowed my pride and decided to confess anyway.

My lips parted and just as I was about to speak, someone shouted at us.

"Hey!" A man yelled.

He was deep in the alley and heading toward us.

"I'd love to explain, but we need to run like hell right now."

"But-"

"But nothing!" I cut him off. "C'mon, my place is just a couple blocks away from here."