My bestfriend's kiss (WattyAwards 2013)

Chapter 7. Different shades of sadness

It's been exactly a month and two weeks since Andrew and Amber's wedding, Andrew's parents were depressed that their son is all grown up so right after the wedding Andrew's parents took me in for a little vacation just until they can get over their depression. but even until now their depression wouldn't go away. 

And how was I feeling about this? Well here are a few words to enlighten you on how I truly feel even though I was smothered with love of Andrew's parents;

sorrowful, dejected, regretful, downcast, downhearted, disconsolate, out of sorts, low-spirited, forlorn and especially grief-stricken did I mention broken-hearted? I have been a complete wreck since the moment Andrew and Amber said 'I do' and it breaks me even more that Andrew was out there with Amber doing God knows what maybe having the time of his life, here I was lounging out in his parents house being gloomy all over the place since every corner and every crack in this house held memories of me and Andrew.

It was terrifying. 

because instead of feeling the way I used to feel about these memories all I felt now was unhappy. 

Just a few weeks ago I became sick and I didn't know why, Andrew's parents were worried and have been convincing me to go to the doctor but I kept refusing telling them that sooner or later I would recover but after an additional week passed by I was still sick and Andrew's parents stopped convincing me but started forcing me. 

So now we were at Ginger and Jacob's house waiting for the results of my check up. Then the house phone started to ring, "Jennifer sweetheart can you get that!?" Ginger called out from the kitchen. "Hello" I greeted the unknown caller, "Jennifer?" Andrew's voice echoed from the other line of the phone. "Andrew!" I squealed like a little girl seeing Santa Claus.

"What are you doing at my parent's house?" Andrew asked, "You know just a bit of vacation and since you are not here they have been showering me with your mom's delicious food and unconditional love" I teased him, he chuckled and he sighed "I miss you Jen" my heart jumped at his words. "I miss you more Andrew" I said with compassion. Suddenly Ginger shouted from the kitchen "Have you gotten Antler pregnant yet!?" I knew that Andrew heard it because he burst out laughing along with me laughing, 

Ginger came to the room I was in holding a mixing bowl in her arms and a big spoon in her hand. "What? what did I say?" she asked obviously clueless. I giggled again and Andrew let out a chuckle. "It's Amber" I corrected Ginger she shrugged her shoulders and said "What's the different these days!?" making me giggle again. "So did you?" I asked Andrew my heart beating like a frightened bird inside a cage. There was a silence at the other end of the call and I swore that the bird in my chest was trying to commit suicide or something.

"Actually that's why I called" he said, my heart was sill a bird in the cage and I speaker the phone so Ginger could hear. "You can tell it now, Your mom can hear you" I said, Andrew sighed like he had the world on his shoulders at the moment. "mom?" Andrew called out making every single second of the moment thrilling, I felt my lip bleeding since I was biting it too hard due to the thrill of the moment. "Yes Andrew? Something wrong?" Ginger asked seeing the concern but also the anticipation in her eyes and it was also written on her face. 

"No she is not pregnant" he said making me sigh in relief without showing that my heart was now at ease-- at the moment that is. but then the most strangest thing happened Ginger sighed as she smiled. I though she wanted Andrew to have kids? Andrew then sighed again as if that wasn't the sentence to his main point. "Amber doesn't want to have kids" I felt myself tensed because she married Andrew to not have his kids?! 

Ginger's eyes widen and anger written all over her face "Why not!?" she said in her most venomous voice which made me flinched. "She said she was not ready and she would get these baby fat and stuff" he said in a very said voice like instead of having fun on their honey moon they were fighting the whole time. For another strange reason anger started to build up inside of me but also a part of me was satisfied that Amber wasn't pregnant and they have been fighting the whole honey moon. "Not ready!? then why the hell did she decide to marry you!?" I yelled through the phone making Ginger jumped just a little I could tell she was shocked with my reaction.

I clutched my head as I felt a sudden feeling of dizziness. Ginger dropped her bowl and spoon and ran over to me right before the phone could slip out of my hands, "Jennifer!" she shouted with a concerned voice and worried eyes. "Jen? What happened?" Andrew raised his voice at the other end of the call. Ginger enveloped me in her embrace and said "You should go rest" she helped me over to the nearest couch and gently laid me down. 

Ginger went back to the phone and started talking with Andrew, "Drew honey, Jennifer has been sick for weeks" Ginger's sweet voice said through the phone. "What?-- why?" he asked with a voice filled with compassion and it stunned me. "We don't know darling but we'll get her results next week at the doctor, we just hope it's nothing too serious" Ginger explained "Okay, serious or not I'll be there when the results come out. Me and Amber will" he said making me feel sick by the thought of seeing Andrew and Amber together again but this time it's not Bride or groom-to-be. 

They were finally a married couple

and if I would come between a married couple

I would become my worst nightmare.

"Enough about all this sad stuff tell me how are you and Amber doing?" Ginger asked with excitement in her voice, "Well we aren't particularly great just fine" Andrew said making me think what would my life be like if I haven't left Andrew eight years ago or if I was his bride and we were getting married. "Why?" Ginger asked, "She is creative, I can tell you that. Designing clothes for our maids and butlers" he said emphasizing the word 'maids' and 'butlers'. One thing about Andrew that I knew was he wasn't lazy unlike me, he enjoyed doing chores lie mowing the lawn, taking out the trash and others as long as he had music.

And I would take a wild guess that Amber was the lazy type. I wouldn't be lazy if I had a goal on why was I doing the chore. but all I know as I gathered all the information and the words that Andrew was saying is that;

I would be a better wife than Amber.