DEAD INSIDE

(28)

"You're not going to ask me why I was so surprised by your answer about Damian?" I was taken aback by his insistence.

"I wasn't planning on it, no, but I could do if you really liked me to..." I answered as another yawn made me pause in my steps.

He frowned again.

"Ok, ok... Paddington, do tell me why you were so taken aback about what I told you about your cousin..."

"Not again with this Paddington nickname..." He mumbled.

"Your fault. You're all nice when it's only the two of us and then you turn into scary polar bear mode as soon as we have an audience..." I protested.

"You think I'm scary?"

"Very."

"She said with a cute smile..."

"Nah..." I corrected him and yawned again. "That was no smile... That was me stifling a yawn..."

He laughed.

"So you don't like my cousin." He tried again.

"Truth time?" I yawned and he nodded. "I do... Like him, I mean... But whenever I consider the possibility of more, he royally messes up, which tells me that even though he genuinely seems to like me too, he's not ready to trust a girl, yet." I decided to be totally honest with him. "Which kind of suits me fine because as I've already told him twice, I've got too much crap to deal with in my life without adding any more drama into it..."

"You were serious, then..." He mumbled under his breath as we reached the landing of the second floor.

"I'm kind of ruining your game day, aren't I?" I said as the thought occurred to me.

"I'm not doing anything I didn't choose to do myself..." He argued and I shivered. "You're cold?" His voice was suddenly very low and his eyes looked greener than ever.

"I just need to sleep..." I muttered with my eyes anywhere but on him.

"Do you want me to stay with you until you fall asleep?" In spite of how sleepy I felt, my eyes almost popped out of their sockets.

"Hmm... Paddington?" He groaned but I had to quiet the mini internal panic attack that was going on inside me at that moment. "You don't have a white horse, do you?"

"I don't..." He answered uncertainly with his light brown eyebrows furrowed and no, I was not, once again, tempted to reach between his eyes to un-furrow them (or if I was, it didn't last for more than two seconds).

"Phew! Time to be a good polar bear now, then..." I blurted out uneasily as his light green eyes assessed me with an intensity that scared me.

"Are you really asking me to be an asshole?" He asked in disbelief while shaking his head slowly.

"No need to go that far..." I answered seriously. "A little more standoffish and distant, maybe?"

He laughed loudly so I took that as my cue and headed to the sofa I'd sat on all night and I finally lay down.

A few minutes later, I was out to the world.

<-><-><-><-><->

When I woke up four hours later, it took me a couple of minutes to remember where I was.

At the Hilton's.

I sat up slowly and rubbed the sleep off my eyes.

A folded piece of paper fell to the floor and I froze.