Moment of Reflection

Chapter 22

A/N: AHH Thank you so much for the support guys!!! I absolutely love it and appreciate it so much. I never thought this would reach 400 reads and 70 votes long before the book finishes. Please keep up the great support:) I love you guys. Thank you again. But I also would like to say this chapter isn't what you would have expected. Enjoy:)

"As we continue to analyze poetry, as well as literature," Vito spoke, but I only listened to half of what he was saying.

After our date, I really thought he was going to kiss me, I really did. He began to lean in as if he would, but he quickly jolted away, looking out the window before he started his car to take me home.

He didn't say a word when he dropped me off, but when I began to get out, I asked him one question.

"I know you were going to kiss me. Why didn't you?"

"You're jailbait and I can't risk it."

He waited for me to supposedly get inside before backing out. Though I decided to walk around to the back of the house, opening the patio door but not stepping inside. I had fallen to my knees, letting out a painful cry. The pain in my chest overbaring.

I didn't know if he heard me or not, but the light emitted from his headlights diminished as he backed out of the driveway.

After sobbing for a moment, I made my way into the house, shutting the glass door and lying on the cold floor. Crying in confusion and sadness.

It's been two weeks since the date and he has only treated me as a student. I had tried texting him but he wouldn't respond. So I had deleted all of his contact information along with any history.

It's over for real this time. I had thought.

****

I sat in the middle of the living room. My multiple pill bottles as well as others set out in front of me, a bottle of water, and a piece of paper and pen. I finally deleted all of his contact information and history from my phone. Wanting to forget everything.

I thought about how selfish I was being. Part of me thought the main reason why I was contemplating this was because of him. I thought about how if I did this I would have to deal with the faculty of school knowing. I thought about everything I could be risking and leaving behind. Part of me wondered if I would have the guts to go through with it this time.

Looking up from the blank page, I saw a picture of Dad and I.

He will be waiting. I had thought.

I swallowed, picking up the pen. But then I set it back down.

Why? Why are you doing this? I had thought.

If it's not because of Vito, then what is it? Because if it's because of him that makes this that much more pathetic. You know better. This isn't for attention.

I continued to battle my thoughts. Was it because of Vito? Was it Ben? What was it? If I don't have any real reasons then what am I going to write?

"I love you." I shakily wrote, "I'm sorry."

I didn't really care about the trip, I didn't really care about much.

One by one, I opened up the bottles, spilling their contents out onto the floor.

I wasn't sure how long it would take for anything to kick in, but I knew it would be painless.

I tossed multiple pills into my mouth at once, downing them with water and repeating. Once I felt like it was enough, I picked up my phone and texted Audrey, as she was supposed to pick me up in a few hours.