Dear Diary,
The stars are shining so bright tonight. Or maybe that's just me. Have I died? Am I in heaven? I'm the most blessed potato in the universe.
I went on the date— the outing. I went on the outing with Tomasso and we had coffee and we talked and I might have held his hand a little bit but that's just what friends do, okay? (the words "I''m not in love" seem to be harshly crossed out) I don't like him like that. At all. Not even a little bit. It's not like the way his perfect green leaves bounce or his head captivates me. Or like his magnificent, shiny, red skin makes my mouth water. Not at all. I don't even have a mouth.
Oh, sod it. I'm completely smitten with my co-worker and I have been ever since I've laid eyes on him. I'm gonna call my mother now.
On a completely different note, the New Yolk sunset is more beautiful when someone's watching it with you.
-Spater McStarch
YOU ARE READING
The Diary of a Potato
RandomSpater McStarch was a normal potato, with a normal life, and a normal family. He was completely, utterly normal - in every sense of the word. Unfortunately for Spater, the world has bigger plans for the young potato who spent his entire life on a fa...
