Looking Back

Chapter 19: Monday

The next morning, I woke up in pain. Again. I couldn't believe what my father did last night. He was asleep when I went in the house after watching Tanner leave. After putting my roses in water, my chocolate in the ice box, and the bear on my bed, I went to the living room and woke up my dad so he could eat.

He woke up yelling and cursing. He knocked the plate out of my hand making a huge mess that I was going to have to clean up and grew angrier at the moment.

I pushed the thoughts of my father out of my head and got out of bed day dreaming of Tanner. I wanted to be with him right now. I went to the bathroom to take a shower. When there was no more hot water, I got out wrapping myself in a towel and moved in front of the mirror smiling.

Tanner was in love with me.

I didn't care that we didn't kiss last night. Just being with him was enough for me. I wanted to be with him now. I quickly got dressed and freshened up. I didn't have to go to the library until later on this evening.

I went back to my room and checked my phone for any messages. I had one. It was from Tanner. I quickly opened it.

Tanner: i miss u!

Tamara: i miss u 2!!! (I typed back then pressed send.)

Tanner :( His response was quick) i'll pick u @ 11 i hav practice @ 3

Tamara: i'll be waiting

Tanner: k i can't wait 2 b with u

Tamara: me 2

Tanner: lol got 2 take a shower ttul love you

Tamara: k

I thought about saying I love you too, but changed my mind. I pressed send and went to find something for breakfast. As I entered the living room I looked at my father who was asleep in his chair.

I sighed.

Was my life always going to be like this?

Today was Monday, but there was no school. That evening it started snowing again. I went with Tanner to his house. It was full of life just like all the other nights I've been over there. Jacob was running around while Tanner, his parents, and I talked. It felt good to be around people who loved you. Tanner's family accepted me and treated me like I was their own daughter. His parents asked if I needed anything to just let them know.

Counting down, there were six weeks until prom. I didn't have a prom dress yet and didn't really know how I was going to get one unless...

One day, I stopped by the library to see if Felisha needed any help. She didn't, but I did.

"Felisha, can you take me prom dress shopping sometime this week?"

"Yes, of course. Let me check my schedule and see what day."

"Okay." I followed her into her office.

Felisha went to her desk and began checking her schedule. "I'm off tomorrow."

"Good." I didn't have work tomorrow either.

The next day after school, Felisha picked me up in her small car and we drove to Dallas to find me a dress. The trip took four hours to get there...

It took us forever to find the perfect dress.

"What kind of dress do you want?" Felisha was making a list.

"I don't know," I answered honestly.

"What's the theme," she asked trying to be helpful.

"Hollywood."