Enticing Disaster

Chapter 27 - Emma

I let the cold water run down my body.

Susan. My real mother. I know the truth, and I know the games my father are playing between the two women.

My body tenses. I'm crying but it's hard to tell, the water from the shower head drags it down my body.

Susan Grey is my real mother. She is the lady who gave birth to me. The one who still wishes me on my birthday despite not knowing I'm alive. My other mother, the one who lives with us has been calling me her daughter her whole life. My father is a lying, manipulative man. One with no heart.

Andrew will be devastated that I know. I know how hard he's been trying to hide it from me.

I slam my fist against the cold, hard tile. Anger builds in, as if I'm ready to kill someone. My whole life has been a joke, or worse, a game.
So many people have been playing me and I've been a fool for playing along.

I close my eyes, no real parents and it's not like I can go to Susan and be like "hey it's your daughter, the one you haven't seen in over twenty so years."

When I open my eyes, my sight goes to the razor sitting by the sink. I know I shouldn't.
I know it's wrong but I can feel it. I can sense it. I have nothing left.

Sliding the shower door to the side, I stretch my hand and grab at the blade.

I take a deep breath. This is a bad idea. I place the blade softly against my wrist, the metal cold against my bare wet skin.

I close my eyes and pull the blade while pressing it against my skin. Blood drips from my skin and the water washes away the blood against my toes.

"Babe, are you done?" Andrew says behind the door.

My heart almost jumps out of my chest. Hearing his voice registers how much of a bad idea this was. I fall to my knees, my breathing slows.

I can hear Andrew's voice behind the door again but I can't figure out what he says. My eyes beg me to give up.

I open my mouth but suddenly I notice Andrew standing by the door, his body still as he watches me.

Without a second to spare, he pulls the shower door open and grabs my naked body and pulls it against his, my blood staining his white shirt, red.

"What happened, Emma?" Andrew says in panic as he looks around.

"I give up," I whisper because it's all I can muster.

He grabs my chin and faces me. "No, babe."

He places me against the tiled floor, my wrist aching from the pain.

"Babe, I need you to fight through," he says. "Just for me," he whispers.

I smile. Every single time I've said that, he's been by my side, he fights through. It would be wrong if I gave up on him. I can't do that.

"Just for you," I whisper back trying my best not to fade away.

He rushes back into the bedroom before reappearing by my side with the first aid kit.

-------------

My eyes open. I'm not dead but I'm hurting.

"That was stupid," Andrew says as he stands from the couch and walks over to me.

I kneel my head down so that I don't have to look him in the eye. "I'm sorry."

"Want to tell me why you thought it was a good idea to end your life?"

I shake my head.

"Dammit, Emma," he shouts throwing the book in his hand hard against the ground. "You almost died."

"I'm sorry," I whisper again.

He grabs my face and kisses me lightly. "Don't be sorry, just tell me what's wrong. Clearly something is wrong or else you wouldn't have done that."

"I know about Susan," is all I have to say for his face to lose all colour.

"How?"

I shake my head. "Doesn't matter, you should've told me."

Andrew looks down. "I couldn't," he says. "After everything, how could I?"

"Your book," I say.

He watches me carefully. "My book?"

"That green one. It fell off the table when I was looking for my watch yesterday. A picture slipped out. I picked it up to put it back in when I saw that it said Susan Grey," Emma says in pain. "I've heard dad talk to someone like that, so I read your book. I didn't mean to but I read it anyways."

Andrew nods. "Fair enough," he says. "Doesn't mean you end your life or try to hurt yourself."

"Don't you see what has become of my life. No one I know is real or honest with me. I have no one."

Andrew grabs my hand and places it over his chest. "You have me."