When I Fail

30 3 3
                                    

When I fail, I do not sleep.
When I fail, I stare at the ceiling
looking for answers to why I am weak.
I look out the window searching for God, looking for a sign or His hand
but always realizing that I am blind.
Everytime I fail, I don't sleep.
I haven't slept for days.
I just write.
Write the pain away, write for answers,
write for strength, write to find God,
write to see His hand,
write to discover a way to stand up
better next time,
I stay up and write for my life.
I don't always get what I want,
I rarely find what I seek,
but when I look back sometimes I can see a glimpse of something,
a peek of a great thing I can't quite fully see,
I don't know what it is yet,
the picture is not finished,
the story is not done,
but I see little snatches of what could
one day be a better me.
So when I fail, I write.
I write in hopes of molding that unseen person a little more than the time before.
Who knows, perhaps I may get to meet her
and she'll thank me for all the words I gave her, for all the strength I threw at her
in times of distress,
for all the tears that washed away the blood from her chest,
I write for a new person and
for this old one too,
and a day when we will meet and melt into one a soul that has both failure and strength
and a both battles well won.
SK

She Follows the Birds to Freedom Where stories live. Discover now