sHe (Haylor)

Chapter 13

Chapter 13

She holds to herself during breakfast, as if something more than just me being drunk is on her mind. I wonder if her travels to buffalo for the mom was detrimental to her thoughts. I can't imagine seeing a mother who has no control of her legs or lower half of body and then have to deal with cancer. The thought of interviewing her makes me sad, let alone actually getting to know her.

"Everything okay?" I ask, shoving bread into my mouth to help sober up.

I see a fake smile run through her lips. She nods with hesitance, "I'm great"

Of course a girl lies to a guy, it's pretty typical. She either doesn't want to talk about it in general or she doesn't want to talk about it with me.

"Okay" I give her this one, "how was the trip? You're kind of back early, no?" I ask, giving her a smile, trying to not make it look like I'm badgering her.

Taylor stabs at her pancake, "it was really depressing, actually. I was forced to leave early because she was having some kind of difficulty." Her voice is relaxed, with a sad time to it, "I wasn't able to get the interview, so the long drive wasn't really worth it. Kind of annoyed"

"I can understand" I respond, taking a bite of her pancakes. "Well, after my exam, we can just hang out, no need to drive anywhere or anything. If you're down to just hang out" I ask, going back to my food.

Taylor sits quiet, thinking about whatever is on her mind. She never really responds to me, just sits, finishing her food and coffee. Her mood is shot, it really is, and it hurts me I'm not sure what to do about it.

I help her out of the booth after we've paid the bill and she gives me a smile before heading out the door.

She pulls into my apartment complex, parking outside the door. "Do you want to come in?" I offer but Taylor sits still, "we don't have to talk about whatever on your mind" I say but she shrugs

"You should start studying. Your test is soon" she gives me one last fake smile before kissing me on the cheek. "Call me when you're out and I can come over with dinner"

"I'll make dinner, don't you worry about that" I say, giving her a smile that she struggles to return. I know her driving all one way isn't what's really on her mind. I understand being bummed out but this is close to borderline depressive.

I attempt to kiss her over the center console, but she moves for me to kiss her cheek. That one hurt for sure, but I know it's deeper rooted than that.

Becca is still sitting on our couch by the time I get in. She's taking Motrin from the bottle, rubbing her head thoroughly. "I got royally fucked up Brit" she laughs, taking a bottle of water to her lips.

"Yeah, I did too" I chuckle, "you sister came by. She was in a funk and I don't know why"

"That's just Taylor. She's fucking moody" Becca lays her head back down on the couch

"And you're not?" I laugh, grabbing my books to join her, "no, it was like something was weighing heavy on her mind. Something was bothering her"

"Oh!" She catches a thought, "yeah I told her we fucked" Becca jokes, receiving a throw of a book from me. She keeps laughing but doesn't change my puzzled mood.

With the jokes put aside, as well as my thoughts of Taylor, I had to open up my book and go over the procedure one last time.

Becca stays, even as I get ready for my exam, placing scrubs and my white jacket over my body. I knew I could do this, I have the whole surgery down to a t, but that didn't help me from doubting myself.