Skins: Season 3

JJ

These couple past days I'm feeling a bit of. Love is a bit of a head fuck. And honestly, all people around me makes me want to go mad and makes me want to punch someone.

Effy is acting weird, so is Freddie and Cook. I think it's the whole three musketeers' separation thing which is so messed up.

I'm sitting in my room and music is on so freaking loud, but it's good, because that is the only way I can't hear my own thoughts. I'm smoking like fifth cigarette this morning and trying to decide should I put on a t-shirt or not. I sit like that, until I hear something smash on the floor, I turn around and it's JJ. I cover myself and turn the music down.

"JJ, what the fuck?" He just stares at me "What the fuck?"

"Sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry"

"Give me my t-shirt" JJ looks around the floor and hands me my t-shirt.

"I'm sorry. The door was open, I... I got worried"

"About what?"

"You and Freddie"

"Haven't seen him for days"

"Sorry?" I walk closer to him "Uh oh"

"JJ. Are you gonna give me some kind of fucked up hint what are you talking about?"

I... I... I usually drink mango juice when I get overstressed"

We go in the kitchen and I pour him a cup of juice. He drinks the first cup, then I pour him one more, he drinks that one as well.

"So?"

"I think it must be these new pills they've given me. Vivid dreams. It's the side effect. It does other stuff too"

"Like?"

"Calms you, makes you tell the true ale gently"

"What's wrong with that?"

"Don't know. Don't know"

"Come on, JJ, don't be pathetic. It's easy. Just tell me something true" I stare at him, but he still doesn't say anything "Tell me. Tell me now"

"I love you" He blurts out and shocks me "And Effy. I love Effy too"

"Well everybody loves us" I lean back in the chair.

"Personal relief"

"She's officially of the rails. Ever thought about going of the rails?"

"No. I can't. My mum, she needs me to be okay"

"Is that why you take all the pills?"

"Pretty much. Please don't leave him alone, Sophie" I close my eyes.

"And he likes you too"

"Who?"

"You know who. But Freddie loves you"

"Doesn't seem like he still loves me" I'm hurting so much to say that, but I'm actually feeling kind of relieved "I think he's cheating on me"

"He loves you" JJ repeats.

"Of course he does"

"We're still friends, right Sophie?" JJ gets up.

"Always and forever" I answer trying to hold from crying. When JJ leaves I get back into my room and go for a bath.

****
My phone starts ringing. I look over at it and see that it's Freddie.

"Hey" He says.

"Hey" What the fuck does he want?

"Thomas invited us all to a party" Freddie seems less awkward than usual "Wanna go?"

"Sorry" Not sorry "Can't, have louds of school work" And I'm not even lying to him.

"So you're not going?"

"Only when I finish the work"

"Okay, fine, I love you"

"Mhm" I hang up and couple moments later it starts ringing again.

"Freddie, I've told..."

"I suggest we get monumentally fucked up" Emily says.

"Ems, I can't..."

"Please, I actually need it" I think about it for couple of seconds.

"Okay, fine"

"And one more thing, Sophie?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm gay"

"I already knew that, Ems" I hang up and get from my books.

****
I take some dark long shirt and put on some jeans. Emily is here like a half hour later and we go to some party where Thomas lets us in.

"Friends don't pay" He says and I smile at him.

Couple minutes later I lose Emily in the crowd of dancing and sweating bodies, but honestly I don't care anymore, because I've already drank like a half bottle of vodka.

I'm dancing with the bottle in my hand and not see or feel anything around me until someone grabs my shoulder.

"Sophie?" I hear Freddie ask.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, he caught me. I turn around fearing to look at him.

"What are you doing here?" Freddie asks.

"Freddie" I say pretending that everything is alright.

"Weren't you supposed to be studying?"

"Emily asked me..." I begin to talk and suddenly I see Cook.

Freddie grabs my hand and we go to were JJ is standing.

"What the fuck is he on?" Freddie asks. JJ gives Freddie the same medicine Emily had "How many, JJ?" JJ doesn't hear him "How many?!"

"Four and another two"

"What does this stuff do?"

"Calms you down and stuff"

"You see that?" Freddie asks JJ and squeezes my hand really hard, I try to get it out, but he just doesn't let go "You stupid fucking twat!" Freddie yells at JJ, lets my hand go and goes to help JJ.

"I'm sorry" JJ says to me and goes to help them as well.

They all get into a fight that Cook started. They both punch couple of people and picks Cook from the ground.

When they go out of here, I go after them.