Apologies (A Phanfiction )

Chapter 28

Phil and I ran off stage chuckling at all the people who were screaming for us to come back. We had just ended our last show of the Australian TATINOF. "I'm going to go get changed. I'll meet you back here alright?" Phil smiled and me. I nodded and watched him walk off. I went over to my dressing room and changed back into my black skinny jeans and a sweater. I met Phil back at the spot he said. "So meet and greet then dinner?" He raised an eyebrow at me and I nodded. We headed out to the line where we were holding the meet and greet. Everyone cheered for us as soon as we were in sight. I smiled at all of them, "Who's ready to get some awkward pictures?" The crowd cheered and Phil chuckled. We stood in place and did the poses people asked of us, listening to their stories if they had one, and taking the gifts they got us. It was nice seeing all the people who supported us. Once we reached the end of the line, we both got a little emotional. "Thank you guys for coming, it was so nice to meet you all," Phil shouted so everyone could here. The crowd roared with excitement as Phil and I went back to our dressing rooms to collect our things. He was carrying the box of gifts we got from all the fans.

"Can you believe it, Dan?" Phil smirked at me from across the table. We were sitting in a busy restaurant that had quiet music playing in the background. "So we go home now and get ready for the wedding?" I let my shoulders relax as Phil nodded and took a sip of the fruit drink he ordered. I got a drink myself as well, I don't remember the name because it was all fancy sounding. I took a sip of my drink, it was sour tasting, but it was nice. Phil was snacking on the dessert he ordered for the both of us. I let him eat the rest because I was full. I continued to sip on my drink. "Does that have alcohol in it?" Phil raised his eyebrow at me and I just shrugged. He went back to eating, but only had one bite left. We had already paid before we got the dessert so we finished our drinks and headed home. We were just walking since it wasn't that far from the hotel. "If I wear a black tux, you'll wear a white one, right?" Phil asked as we were walking into the hotel. "Does that make me the bride?" I gave him a questioning look. "I guess so, yeah. I mean I did propose to you so," Phil shrugged. "Yeah why not," I chuckled. Phil smiled and hit the elevator button, "You'll look great in white. I promise." I rolled my eyes which mad Phil gasp. We both started chuckling and went up to our room.

Phil and I flew back home a day after. I started drinking a bit more without thinking. Phil seemed to get sad that I was doing it, but honestly, that only made me drink more. Weeks were happening in blurs and I couldn't understand. Phil and I were relaxing on the sofa watching a movie one night when I got a phone call. "Unknown number," I questioned. "Answer it," Phil said, pausing the movie. "You can keep watching the movie," I told Phil and watched him hit play again. I stood up and stepped out of the room to answer the call. "Daniel Howell?" A quiet voice spoke. "Um, yeah?" I questioned. "This is Peter Hart from Cast Funeral Home, we send our regards for your family's recent loss, but I would like to meet in person to discuss some things." I scrunched up my eyebrows, "What loss? What are you talking about?" "Oh? You haven't heard?" Peter asked with slight pity in his voice. "No I haven't," I gulped. "Your parents were in a car accident last week, died on impact." I froze, "N-No. I need to go I-" "But we need to t-" I hung up the phone and stared blankly at the wall for a minute. That's why I got a bunch of calls from the hospital while in Australia.

Then it hit me and I fell to my knees in a fit of tears. I don't think Phil could hear me and honestly I think I needed to be alone right now. I made my way to the kitchen, wiping my face off, and poured myself a drink. I chugged it down quickly. Phil walked in and gave me a dirty look, "I can't believe it." I looked away from him. "You're drinking again?" Phil sighed. I rolled my eyes and took another glass. "It's not your say," I muttered. "Speak up," Phil scoffed. "It's not your fucking say!" I shouted at him. "Of course it is! I'm marrying you, Dan," he shouted back. "It was two glasses, Phil. Stop shouting at me," I growled at him. "Two glasses too much," Phil turned around. "Where are you going?" I followed him out. "I'm packing," he said, pushing himself into the bedroom, trying to shut the door in front of me, but I stopped it. "Where do you think you're going?" I chuckled at him out of anger. "Away," he staring shoving clothes and his laptop into his bag. "You're leaving me?" My eyes widened as I watched him zip up the back. "Until your get your head back," Phil sniffled. Was he crying? "Phil I-" "Save it," he pushed past me and didn't stop until he was out of the flat. My parents are dead and now my fiancé is gone.

I walked back in the kitchen and stared at the glass of whiskey on the counter. I threw it at the wall and started crying again. I poured the rest from the bottle into the sink and threw it away. I took out my phone and went to text Phil, but I called him instead. I got voicemail, "Phil- Phil please I'm sorry. Come home okay? I really need you. I got bad news on that phone call." I hung up and slid down to the floor. "Why do I always fuck things up?" I leaned my head back on the cabinet. I hit the back of my head on it a couple of times before resting it in my knees, "I'm a screw up of epic proportions." I shut my eyes for a second before getting up and taking a shower. I didn't even bother messing with my hair. I through on sleep pants and a sweater and fell back on the bed. It smelled like Phil and made me start crying again. I stayed there for a while thinking about everything and possibly starting to have an anxiety attack.