𝕊𝕋𝕆ℝ𝕀𝔼𝕊 𝔽ℝ𝕆𝕄 𝔸 𝕎𝕆ℝ𝔻 ～ 𝘋𝘺𝘭𝘢𝘯 𝘖'𝘉𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯

20) Jocular

Jocular (adjective) [jok-yuh-ler]
Give to or characterised by joking or jesting

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

You put on your jacket and rubbed your protruding belly. You smiled. You were proud and excited about being a mother soon.

You walked towards the living to find your husband putting his shoes on. "Ready to see our baby?" Dylan stood up and asked. "Of course!" You replied.

The two of you walked to your car. Dylan helped you sit and you put on your seat belt. He held you hand all the way to the doctor's.

You were nervous. You really wanted to see your baby but... you didn't feel the same today.

*****

"Mrs. O'brien?" The receptionist called out and gestured towards the hallway. You looked at your husband who had the biggest smile. You took a deep breath and walked towards the doctor's room.

Dylan opened the door. The doctor was sitting at the desk looking at some papers. "[y/n]! So glad to see you," she greeted as you walked towards the bed.

"I'm glad to see you too!" You said. The doctor tapped the bed, "Let's take a look at the baby." You lay down on the bed and pulled your shirt up. You've done this many times but you still felt slightly shy.

The doctor massaged the ultrasound gel onto your stomach and placed the scanner on top. She moved it around, a happy expression on her face, but it so  turned to grief.

"Umm... I-I can't get... A heartbeat," the doctor stuttered. You stared at her then turned to Dylan, who had the same expression as yours. The doctor moved the device around your stomach once again but her face didn't change.

"I'm sorry but... you've had a miscarriage."

Your heart sunk. It felt as someone poked a hole with a nail and all the life came bursting out. Tears formed in your eyes. You couldn't believe what you had just heard.

You looked at your husband, who had tears in his eyes. "W-What?" Was all you managed to say.

"I'll inform you about the next steps to take. I'm so sorry..." the doctor said as she made her way to her table. Dylan grip on your hand grew tighter. His eyes were covered by his free hand.

You felt sad, angry, depressed and in denial. You were an emotional wreck, and no one blamed you.

You wanted your baby back... but you accepted that it was never going to happen.

*****

After the procedures

You sat at the porch, a cup of tea in your hands. You looked down at your stomach, expecting it to be bulging out but...

You were going to have a breakdown, again, but your husband tapped you on the shoulder. "Hey honey, did you see the video I sent you?" He asked. You shook your head.

"I thought you'd like it. It's of these cute kittens being funny and..." Dylan looked at you and stopped. He saw the sadness draped behind that smile on your face.

"Honey... you know I don't like seeing you like this," Dylan said. You couldn't control your emotions and you collapsed into his arms. You sobbed into his chest.

"I just... I wanted to be a mom so bad," you cried between your tears. "And you can be," Dylan said and you looked up at him, "Look, this happens to thousands of people. I'm broke  inside but... We'll try again, if it's what you really want."

You made an effort to smile. You kissed your husband's lips. You loved him so much. He held your shoulders. "It'll be fine. We'll have a family, if not now then later on," Dylan said.

You looked down and frowned. Dylan  tickled you, bringing a smile to your face. "Come on, now smile. I don't like seeing my baby all sad and gloomy," Dylan said, the tickles increase.

"Please stop!" You begged at his effort to cheer you up. He obeyed your request and held your hands. You sat in silence for a few moments.

"Remember that song I sang when we got engaged?" Dylan questioned, making you wonder. When you gave no answer, Dylan replied.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey," Dylan sang, his voice sounding beautiful.

"You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away," you continued the song and your husband wrapped his arms around you.

"I love you," you said, receiving a kiss on the head. "I love you too," he said.

"I've got the perfect idea. Let's watch 'Friends'!" Dylan suggested, "It'll make you feel better."

It was true. You LOVED Friends, and always watched an episode or two if you weren't feeling so great.

"Yes, please," You said. The two of you got up and walked to your living room. You cuddled next to Dylan.

What could be better than having a supportive husband and watching one of your favourite TV shows?