After I finished my business (if you know what I mean) i closed out of my photoshopped pictures of donald trumps tiny tiny penis. Wow id love to put that in my ass. I decided it was time to get dressed and ready for the day, well night actually. I dont exactly like sunlight. I put on some spiky black boots, black skinny jeans, and a shirt made out of leaves because im a vegan.
I walked into my kitchen and ate a whole entire turnip because that's what vegans do right? Anyways, I drank some good ole apple juice to wash it down.
It was finally time to do my daily rituals. I have a very detailed routine if you haven't noticed. I lit the candles near my multiple framed photos of daddy trump. I sat down and began to recite a prayer;
Hail Trump, full of misogyny.
Our Lord is with you.
Blessed by old white people,
and blessed is my ass when I see pictures of you,
Holy Trump, Daddy of me,
Spank me for I am a sinner.
Amen.
I blow out the candles and I am done. I'm not really sure if my prayer makes sense but it means a lot to me. I don't know what I'd do without my prayer. It gives me hope that daddy will dm me.
I haven't gone out in a while so I think I'll treat myself today. Maybe I'll go see a movie. Yes that's a great idea! I call an uber and I'm on my way.
While in my uber I think about what movie i want to see. After a lot of thought I decide on sharknado 35. It's been out since July but I never did see it. It's about 3 hours long so that should give Donald plenty of time to reply to me.
***
The movie finally finished and I was exhausted. Watching sharks fall on people is quite exhausting. I took out my phone and opened STDs Go. Wow I caught chlamydia! How exciting!
I took an uber back home and collapsed on my couch. Suddenly my phone vibrates. Could it be?
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Sliding Into His DMs
Fanficthe year is 2048. Mo Lester the son of Dan Howell and Phil Lester goes on a journey to meet the man of his dreams (who happens to be immortal). By @aGayBee