Bittersweet (Wolfstar)

Two

S I R I U S

two weeks later

Sirius Black did not like going to Support Group. Actually, he hated it. The condescending stares from people listening in to the conversations, the small glint of hope in everyone's eyes that being here might make them feel better about being alive. Sirius knew better, though. This wasn't helping anyone. If it were, Lucius wouldn't have killed himself and Marlene wouldn't have taken a razor to her arms again.

He wouldn't be here, going through a very boring form of torture, if it weren't for his best friend, James Potter. He had basically bullied him into attending these wretched meetings that definitely do not help. After he died, nearly a week ago, Sirius couldn't bring himself to stop going. James would practically shit himself if he found out Sirius stopped going, so he didn't.

He never spoke up or shared anything, though. He didn't before James died, and he won't after. He just listens and watches people out on the street, thinking about what they could be going through and if they're sad or happy or okay. Lots of them looked normal. Not smiling or frowning, just walking along to get to the next place. Still, he made up fake lives for the strangers, imagining them going through divorces or just discovering they were pregnant or getting a promotion at their job. Little things.

He didn't really start paying attention to the group until he saw the small boy who looked too young to be here come into the coffeehouse. He looked like he belonged within the Support Group. Empty. Which, come to think of it, is maybe why Sirius took notice of him. He has always had a strange desire to fill other people's emptiness, whether it be with words or sex or anything in between.

The small boy looked like he would melt into a puddle at any moment, his shoulders sagging and face droopy. It was pitiful, but Sirius found himself attracted to him like a magnet. Strong jaw, warm eyes, nose dotted with freckles. The scars that ran across his face made him even more unique. One from his eye, running across the bridge of his nose to the corner of his lip, another from his ear, to his jaw and onto his neck. They practically covered his face, small little nicks or large pink and white slivers that probably used to be thick gashes. Still, he was brilliantly beautiful and brilliantly depressed. Two qualities Sirius knew he also possessed.

It was the second time the Lupin boy came to the Support Group that Lucius Malfoy had done himself in. Albus requested that they all attended the funeral next week, but he knew most of them wouldn't show up. Sirius thought it would be an insult to Lucius. None of them really knew each other. They knew their names and why they wanted to die, but not a single person in the circle would call any of the others a friend. Funerals are meant for family and friends and love. None of them would fit in any of those categories. They would be showing up to a strangers funeral.

"Mr. Black, I strongly suggest you should share. Perhaps if you were to open up, Mr. Lupin would, too." Albus interrupts his thoughts, shattering his train of thought. Sirius was a little grateful for that. He didn't much like thinking about death. Not in recent days, anyways. He had seen his best friend and his wife, dead on the ground. Death has given him nightmares.

"I don't want to." He admits, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly and looking across the circle at the small boy. Sirius figured he had to be a minor. Sixteen or seventeen, possibly. He, himself, is only just nineteen. A child compared to the others here. Albus at, what looks like, over one hundred years old, Marlene in her thirties, and Hagrid in his forties or fifties.

"Why would you be here, if you weren't going to share? This is not a place you're required to be. If you're not going to talk about what you feel, why be here?" Albus says with a small frown, his bushy eyebrows knitted together permanently, it seems, whenever he talks to Sirius. He wanted all of them to get better, but it wouldn't happen if one refused to open up.