Bittersweet (Wolfstar)

Eight

S I R I U S

If it weren't for Remus constantly being around, Sirius would have already offed himself. He is getting worse. He can't stop thinking about James and Lily. Every moment of everyday, he is reminded of them by simple things. The ugly vase James bought him as a gag gift three birthdays ago that sits in his bedroom, the cat that used to live with the Potters but now slinks around his apartment somewhere, even the motorcycle because James used to ride with him and Lily would always get angry at them both.

Remus keeps him grounded. Keeps him from drifting off to the bad place too long with his stories of Nymphadora and useless facts he has learned over the years. Sirius doesn't tell Remus how much he means to him, and he doesn't tell Remus he needs him around to make him happy. It's an unexplainable feeling that he has in his chest whenever Remus is around. It feels free and loose and he finally has room to breathe after weeks of not having his best friends to talk to.

It is three months after the funeral when Sirius realizes exactly how much he has come to need Remus.

"Did you know that ants can live for up to six hours underwater?" He says, a mouthful of chips. He picks another one up off of the plate and holds it up for Sirius to see. "Did you also know that Americans call these French Fries?" Sirius looks at him with confusion, picking up his own chip and inspecting it.

"What for? Chips makes much more sense." Sirius sighs, eating the chip and throwing one off of the pier to the seagulls.

"I don't know why, but I assume it's because they were made in France, and you do fry them, after all." Remus shrugs, finishing his plate off and wiping his fingers off with a serviette. He watches Sirius as he finishes his last chips and they get up together, leaving the restaurant. "Do you reckon I should date again? I-I've been thinking on it recently, and I'm not sure. I really value your opinion, and I want to know what to do."

"Before I say anything else, just remember that an opinion without pi is just an onion." Sirius smirks, both the boys getting on his motorcycle. "I think you shouldn't. Not yet. It's only been five months and you can't even talk about her in group. You're not ready."

"Oh, thank Harry Styles. I was hoping you would say that." Remus laughs nervously, leaning his head on Sirius' back and wrapping his arms around him as he starts the engine. They put on their helmets and Sirius looks back at Remus.

"Thank Harry Styles?"

"He's my god." Remus explains, feeling Sirius' deep laugh rumble in his chest as he drives out of the parking lot and onto the highway.

As he stops at a stoplight there's a sudden, rough bump in the back of the motorcycle that jerks the pair of them forward. Sirius looks back to see a car with three teenagers behind them, laughing. The driver rolls down his window and sticks his head out, "Hey, f**gots! Nice bike." He chortles, looking back at his friends for validation. "You pair of pufferfish going to the f*g convention?" He says louder, pulling his head back in as the light turns green. Sirius stiffens up and drives, Remus lifts his head from his back and loosens his grip around his waist. They hear the driver behind them revving their engine, and it hits the back of the motorcycle again.

It all happens in the blink of an eye. The car rides up on the back of the tire, making the entire vehicle spin out of control and fall over, throwing both Sirius and Remus off. The car is hit by two others with deafening crashes, and stops with a screeching halt after running over Remus' arm, stopping feet from Sirius' head.

The driver and passenger from one car that hit the boys hurry from their vehicle and rush to the aid of everyone else involved. A woman puts the back of her hand over Sirius' mouth, feeling no breath against it. She taps his shoulders roughly. "Are you okay, sir? Are you alright?" She says heavily, rubbing her thumb across his cheek, and locking her hands together, starting compressions on his chest. "Hey, please wake up. Please. Your friend is hurt bad. He needs you to wake up. I need you to wake up. Those boys can't be responsible for killing you or your friend. Please." She hums, looking at the sky, "Lord, please save him. He is too young. Please help him." She whispers, just as air splutters from his mouth. He takes a deep, hard breath and opens his eyes. "Oh, oh. Thank God. Are you okay?" She asks, pulling his helmet off to find the inside coated with blood. "Oh, no."

"I'm okay. Where's Remus? Is he okay? Where is he?" He asks, frantically searching the area for any sign of his best friend. His heart pounds, his head hurts, his chets hurts, his cheek hurts. Everything hurts. He pushes himself off of the ground and walks unsteadily to the car full of teenagers. The window is cracked with blood dripping down, the driver slumped over in his seat. The passengers chest is cut open by the seat belt, the gray material embedded in his skin. The boy in back is seemingly sleeping in the backseat, lying down on his side. Sirius' lip quivers and he searches around for Remus again. He spots a man on the other side of the road, pumping on something.

No, putting life into Remus' body.

Sirius runs as fast as he can, hearing sirens in the far background, and kneels beside Remus, who isn't breathing. "Rey. Rey, don't be dead. You can't be dead." Sirius sobs, tears running down his cheeks as he observes him. There is a large, angry, red burn along his cheek from the road that has pulled skin away, his arm lays nearly flat against the asphalt, his shirt is ripped away and burned the same way as his cheek, only twice as bloody and red. Sirius chokes as he sees the blood spreading rapidly from a gash on his head. "Please, please, please! Remus! Don't be dead! Wake up! WAKE UP! REMUS! YOU HAVE TO WAKE UP! I CAN'T DO THIS WITHOUT YOU! YOU HAVE TO!" Sirius screams, cradling his head as the man pushes repeatedly against Remus' chest, trying to restart his heart. "REMUS! YOU'VE GOT TO COME BACK!" He sobs, trying to lean against his lifeless friend, but the man pushes him back.

"Stop. I need room." He says sternly, his face straight, looking back to see the ambulance arriving. Sirius cries harder, lying on the road and looking up at the night sky. A woman kneels beside him and taps his shoulder.

"Is Remus okay?" He asks the woman, sitting up a little too quickly. "Is he alive?"

"Are you okay? Can you tell me what day it is?" She helps him stand and he looks over at Remus, but he is already gone. All that's left in the spot is a pool of blood. "Sir?" Sirius looks away and follows her.

"It's...um...S-September. No, October. No..." He stammers, breathing in and looking at the woman. "I don't remember."

"What about the year?"

"Twenty...twenty fifteen?"

"Okay, right this way." She helps him up into an ambulance that already has an occupied gurney. Sirius looks at the person, but hardly recognizes him. The blood, cuts, and glass all over his face makes him nearly indistinguishable, but not for someone who had spent thirteen years with him. The boy opens his eyes, breathing short, harsh breaths, and looks at Sirius.

"Sirius?" He whispers, his voice forced and awkward. Sirius kneels beside the gurney and presses his lips to the boys hand.

"It is." He nods, "It's me, Reggie."