Bittersweet (Wolfstar)

Nine

S I R I U S

Sirius hardly remembers the crash at all. It happened so quickly and so violently that his mind just can't grasp the memory of it. The first thing he remembers is seeing Remus on the asphalt, dying. Bleeding. He still shakes at the thought, but can't explain why he reacted so emotionally. Sure, Remus is his only friend, but that doesn't seem to call for Sirius reacting almost the exact same way as when he found James and Lily's bodies.

He was admitted to the hospital nearly seven hours ago, but he still hasn't heard anything about Remus or Sirius' little brother, Regulus. He was examined by several doctors and specialists for his head injury, and they say his memory loss is from the traumatic experience and his blood loss wasn't as severe as it looked. They cleaned up the road burn on his cheek, legs, and shoulder as they weren't too severe. He is sleeping when a nurse comes in, shaking his shoulder lightly.

"Sirius, your friend, Remus, is alright. He just woke up if you want to come and visit him." She smiles and Sirius nods, throwing his feet off of the bed and shuffling behind the nurse. She leads him down multiple halls to the ICU, where she points to the first door. "In there." She whispers and Sirius nods, knocking tentatively on the door. He hears a small 'come in' and opens it slowly to see Remus attached to a dozen tubes and wires, his cheek and chest heavily bandaged, there is a sling on his arm, and his sandy blonde curls all shaved off to get to the gash on his head.

"I heard you had a little amnesia." Remus smiles, his eyes crinkling in the corners. Sirius walks further in, shutting the door, and seeing Lyall sitting beside Remus, avoiding Sirius' eyes.

"No, just memory loss from being traumatized or whatever." He pauses, swallowing hard, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for that to happen. I tried to get away from them, but they went too fast and rode up on the back tire. I don't really know what happened from there because I supposedly died and a woman gave me CPR. It was mental, and I wish you hadn't gotten hurt. Not as bad as you had. Not at all, actually." Sirius apologizes, approaching Remus, but Lyall stands between them.

"I think you've done enough damage without trying to make up excuses. I know it was your fault. You're lucky I don't report you. I'm only not doing so because Remus asked me not to. The police asked Remus and he told me he had to lie and say that it was just an inexperienced driver getting too close and he didn't want to get anyone in trouble. One of those boys died and the other two are in critical condition, did you know? Another of the drivers involved is hurt horribly. It's your fault, Sirius Black." He spits the words out like venom, and Sirius' breathing shallows, looking over at Remus who shakes his head.

"I need a moment alone with Remus, and if you don't give it to me then I will make sure you will never walk again." He growls, not breaking eye contact with Remus.

"Is that a threat?"

"Yes. I am a Black, you must remember. My father may be dead but his business still works for my family and I suggest you listen to me. I'm sorry, but I know this is the only way to get you out." Lyall looks back at Remus, who nods, and glares at Sirius as he leaves the room, shutting the door behind him.

"Why did you threaten him, Sirius? I could have handled it." Remus huffs, touching his shaved head with his good arm.

"No, you couldn't've. He wasn't going to listen to you or me, unless I said what I had to. My dad's old company doesn't work for us anymore. I lied. I just wanted to ask what the fuck you think you did to me? Those kids were tormenting us, and they are the ones who caused the whole thing, no matter how you spin it. I have been thinking so hard about how it could be my fault because it must be, but when your dad accused me of killing that kid and injuring you and Re...that other driver, I remembered the whole thing." He pauses, taking a deep breath, "Your dad cannot think that I am the one who did this. I'll never see you again and I can't handle that. I can't. I lost James and Lily, I lost Harry, I lost my uncle, and I can't lose you, too. You have to tell him the truth, or I will."

"We can't, Sirius. Those parents of the boys can't have the potentially last memories of their sons be ruined by a stupid decision. They can't know that their sons basically killed themselves by trying to scare us." Remus pleads, his lip quivering as he speaks. Sirius clenches his jaw.

"That was a hate crime, Rey. They did that on purpose. Maybe not the part where they knocked over the bike or were hit by two vehicles that rammed into the side of their car, but they meant to do that. He sped up and his bumper got caught on the tire. He did that and at least your dad needs to know why. If the police come and talk to me, I'm telling the truth, so maybe you should, too. I will not let them get away with hurting you like they have, sixteen or eighty. It doesn't matter. I suggest you make up your mind." Sirius finishes, patting Remus' knee gently and leaving the room without another word.

//

The police knock on the door at nearly six in the morning, when he is sleeping again. He shifts himself and sits up as they enter, stretching his arms and yawning. "Good morning, Mr. Black." A tall, young man smiles. He looks to be in his thirties and his fiery red hair is combed over on his head. "Can I ask a few questions about the accident?"

"Of course. Did you already speak to Remus again?" He asks, and the man nods.

"Yes. Mr. Lupin told us everything correctly this time. We have the video footage from the traffic cameras so we know what really happened, we just need to make sure you do and we want your statement. I'm Officer Weasley, but you can call me Arthur."

"Nice to meet you, Arthur. I'm going to start with the boys behind us rolling their window down and terrorizing me and my friend. I assume they thought we were dating or something because they called us slurs and then proceeded to follow close behind us and get stuck on our back tire when they got too close. Remus and I fell over and their car ran over his arm and was crashed into by two other cars. A woman saved me, a man saved Remus." He says, his heart aching as he remembers seeing Remus dying and Regulus with glass and blood all over him. "Have you spoken to Regulus yet? I haven't heard about him. It's my brother." Sirius asks, and the man looks at the floor, messing with his belt buckle for a moment before looking up.

"We have not." He says simply, giving Sirius a fake smile. "Is that all, Mr. Black?"

"Yes. Can you ask the nurse if I can speak to Reggie?"

"I'll ask her to come and...talk to you." He nods, giving a small wave and leaving the room. Sirius smiles at the ceiling, his heart pounding in anticipation to see his brother again.

Sirius waits five minutes before he concludes the officer forgot about his request, and he slides out of bed and into the hall. He finds his nurse sitting behind the counter, typing on her phone. "Excuse me? Can I go see my brother? Regulus Black is his name." Sirius asks, smiling at her in the charming way he does. She looks up at him and stands to be eye to eye with him.

"You may want to sit down." She says with a small, kind smile. He shakes his head at her.

"No, no. You can tell me here. Is it that my parents are here? Has Regulus gone home already?" He asks, his eyebrows knitted together.

"No, I...Regulus was hurt. Very badly hurt. He had glass in his throat and head from going through the windshield. There was a piece that had gone deep into his head. When the doctors took it out to keep the glass from doing permanent damage to his brain, he bled out on the operating table. The doctors tried their best to stop it, but nothing would work. He passed, Sirius." She explains, her voice calm and soothing. Sirius laughs at her.

"No, he didn't. I just talked to him in the ambulance. He was fine, just with small pieces in his cheeks and things. Can you just take me to him?" He asks, rolling his eyes. The nurse sighs deeply.

"Sirius, Regulus is dead. He didn't make it through the procedure. When you talked to him in the ambulance were probably his last words. You can take your time to absorb this, but I recommend you do it in the privacy of your room." She says, sitting back down.

"No...He can't be. He was sixteen. He was...my little brother. Little brothers don't die before big brothers. That's not possible." He whispers, and then slams his fists on the counter, making the nurse jump. "That's not possible!" He shouts, his chin trembling as he backs away from the counter. His eyes start to go black, white stars covering his field of vision almost completely. He pulls at his hair, then takes off down the hallway, searching for any sign of the boys who killed his brother.