Not Leaving {The Book Thief}

14

Liesels POV
My head was pounding worse than before. Had I been dreaming? I lifted my eyes hesitantly, cautious of the bright lights which would only further prevoke my head ache. The living room was the same as it had always been, the fireplace a few feet away from me and a book shelf by my feet. However when I looked to my chair by the window I saw the slumped over figure. The long elegant hands of Rudy played with his fringe. His eyes were bloodshot and puffy and his pale German face was spotted red. What has happened to my happy Rudy who understood only that Germany was in war, not what we were fighting for? The Rudy who was supposed to grow up watching his siblings grow families and his parents grow old.  His shielded innocence was gone and he was aware of a world more cruel than people hurting me. He was the last perfect beam of light in my world and he had been dimmed. I stretched my fingers toward his knee which was only a foot away from me. He dropped his hair and slid from my chair to my side. "Liesel! Oh Liesel what happened to you? Why did you try to leave me?" He looked up at me with big tearful eyes. When Rudy cried I couldn't help but cry. His boyish glee was let down when he cried leaving him with an aura of sadness. I cupped his face and he cupped mine in return. "I don't understand, what is wrong with me. Has a doctor been here?" I whispered to him as not to wake Sarah and Charles. "One should be here later. Liesel, please don't leave me." A new wave of shakes and sobs overcame him. "I'll never leave you Saukerl, never in a million years." I vowed while lifting his eyes to mine. "I promise you Rudy." He smiled slightly, letting a stray beam of sun through his aura of despair. "Saumensch, tell me the story of what happened to you." He said laying his head next to mine and closing his eyes. "Well..." I told him all about the orphanage and the nuisance I had been. I told him about trying to contact him one day. I told him about my escape shortly after that, "I found a group of savages, and..." I choked back a sob. I pushed this terrifying memory away as immediately as it appeared but today is planted itself there firmly. "What Liesel? What happened?" Rudy said grabbing my tear streaked face and meeting my gaze. "Liesel! Did they hurt you? Those bastards!" He said holding me in his arms. "I-I I asked them about you and Max, they said you had left a week or so ago. Then... then the oldest boy came and shoved me to the ground. He was like Dueshner! Oh Rudy, they kicked me and grabbed my hair and spat on me. And, And... Oh Rudy!" I said pouring words out as I sobbed into his thin shoulder. "Did they kiss you? Liesel, I will kill those bastards, those swine, those sons of..." he drowned on. "Rudy! Sarah and Charles saved me though! Please don't get angry." I wept, trying to reassure him of my health. "I'm sorry, please tell me you are fine though." His ocean eyes pleaded. "I'm fine, the shock of everything was overwhelming. You coming back and Mr. Steiner dying." He blocked out my last statement.

    It wasn't that he was in denial, he was just ignoring the memory. "Would you like to step out for a walk?" He sayed. He crossed over to his far to large jacket. "I guess the air will do me some good." I swung my feet onto the cold wood floor and grabbed my boots. Rudy wrapped an arm around me and we started our walk. I gazed up in amazement at how tall Rudy had become, he was still extremely thin though. I guess you can't overcome a childhood of only enough food to live.  He rubbed his red nose as we walked through the bitter morning mist. "What happened to Max?" I asked finally. "A little while after I found and lost you somebody tipped off a soldier about Max so we made a run to Norway, where my grandparents are. He's still there with them I hope." He reassured me. "I miss him." I stated simply. Rudy bent down and kissed my forehead gently. "Maybe we will get to see him soon, it should be safer for Jews now." He said, bringing the fact that the war was over and Jews and communist were safe now. "My Mother! She can come back to me now!" I yelled. "What do you mean 'now'? Why couldn't she come back before? Was she a Jew?" He asked in complete confusion. I hadn't realized I never talked to him about this. "She was a Communist, she was always being questioned." I told him. "But then the Nazi knew about her? Did she run maybe?" He was worried and was trying to avoid suggesting her dead. "She was in Berlin last, she could have been helped into hiding just like Max! Maybe she was hiding in someone's basement, writing me letters which had no way to reach me." I was practically jumping up and down with excitement. "Well we'd better get to Berlin then!" He smiled from ear to ear and his eyes sparkled with love. "Are you serious? How will we get there!" I felt colour rising to my cheeks. I can see my mother again!

      "My father's last paycheck! Hurry let's go pick it up." We both raced eachother down the street to the tailors just like when we first met. We nearly ran past the shop as we skidded to a stop. Herr Cole looked at us in utter confusion. "Do you two need something?" He asked nervously. "We need to pick up Alex Steiners last check!" I gasped out. "May I ask why you are out of breath?" He was still weary of us. "We need to get to Berlin soon, we hope to leave this afternoon." Rudy said. "Berlin? This afternoon? One second I'll be right back." He dissapeared into the back room. I hopped up and down trying to warm myself while I smiled at Rudy with what I assume was the look of jittery child. "Here, I like you kids and I feel sorry for you. Here is enough for a trip to Berlin. But..." He coaxed. "But what?" We both said quite childishly. "But I must know what you are doing in Berlin." He stated. I turned to Rudy. What if he is a Nazi? "I, um, want to find my Mother. My real mother." I prayed he wouldn't ask why I hadn't seen her. "Hm, Well I can't keep a girl from her mother. But why is Rudy going?" I wanted him to stop asking. "Because I want to meet her." Rudy stated weakly. Rudy was terrible with explainations. "Oh! You wish to ask her something?" Herr Cole winked at us. I looked at the scuffed floor and blushed. "Well here you go, enough for at trip to Berlin and a bit for food." I slipped the money into my bag and said my thank yous and goodbyes. "Rudy! We can go today! Let's hurry home to pack!" I grabbed his hand and ran back to Sarah and Charles.