When Love Takes It's Toll:

Part twenty:

We sat at the breakfast bar all night until early morning talking about everything. Kieran... And the money over a bottle of wine. I for some reason felt so guilty. A helpless man who I once saw strong and stable is now sat in front of me broken and discouraged.

What can I do? I'm made of nothing, I can only give him advice.... But again I'm not exactly the best in that field.
"Listen Alec, you know what you've done has made a mess of things and there's not a lot you can do. Everything you've worked for-" (I can't believe I just labelled his time with me, the love I thought was real as just work.... Who even am I?) "- has been thrown out the window. Alec just be a man about it! Take it on your shoulders and deal with it because you need to sort this out instead of sitting here regretting and worrying about it." I became stern while I pushed his shoulder back so he was sat upright facing me. "Magnus I just don't know what to do. It was stupid to rip up that cheque.... And I've totally messed up between me and you. How could I have done this to you Magnus? How do I deserve you? You should be throwing me out the door right now!" Tears trickled down his cheeks as he whipped them away with the sleeve of his grey slouchy jumper.

"If I'm honest Alexander... I don't know what I'm doing and I should have no sympathy for you after what you've done. But the thing is I wasn't mad and I didn't hate you, I was just disappointed that you turned out to be everything you said you'd never be. But it happens to the worst of us. I'm just gonna have to move on because shit happens." I've never been so bold to confront my emotions like that. "Magnus you're so much stronger than you think... You're like no one I've ever met." He stood up and wrapped his huge arms around me, suffocating me within his grasp.

"Now Alec. You need to go and sort this out. There's not much you can do but you have to do something." I pushed him off of me and stared coldly in his eyes. "Yes yes I know. I'm gonna go sort this Magnus, then we are going to sort out us." He kissed me on the cheek and grabbed his coat that hung on the back of the stool. With in minuets he was out the door and the sound of the car engine disappeared into the distance.

I walked back into the bedroom and sat myself down on the edge of my bed. The pieces of the cheque still ripped into shreds on the floor and the wardrobe door still swung open with the safe gaping in the back of it. My head began to pound as I followed my eyes around the room scanning the photos of me and Alec over the past year and a half...It was like a total whirlwind... Was he really in love with me the whole time like he said? Or is he still lying?

I slept on the thought and woke up around 2:30pm. In my defence me and Alec had been talking the whole of the early morning. I woke to find the house still completely empty just like it was when I fell asleep. Did Alec not come home last night? Where was he? I stood up and rubbed my eyes trying to clear my vision, I couldn't hear the shower running so he wasn't there. As I made my way into the kitchen Alec's coat was still gone and so were his keys. I began to feel slightly panicked so I reached for my phone, there were no messages or missed calls... Nothing. I dialled his number and let it ring 'hello...' 'Alec it's me where are you?' 'Ha got ya.... Leave a message after the beep and I'll try and get back to you, bye' my heart began to race, he always got me with that message. I had no idea where he was, he just kinda fled off in a fluster he was a complete mess, where do I even start?

The club would be too obvious surly he wouldn't be there. Wait... Maybe Simons girlfriend will know... Alec's sister.

Isabelle.