Of Lions, Wolves, and Dragons (Jon Snow)

18. A Decision

Sansa had been understanding when Joellyn was finally able to explain herself.  Sansa had been trapped in her very own engagement until just that day, so she was able to relate to what Joellyn was feeling.  She was also able to calm Joellyn down enough so that Joellyn could have a coherent conversation about who to choose.  With only a week to decide, it was best not to wait too long, Sansa had pointed out.  Her father could grow weary of waiting on her and make the decision himself.  Sansa was, herself, enamored with Loras Tyrell, so Joellyn could not bring herself to tell Sansa that she did not want him because of his affection for men rather than women.  She just spoke of how brave he was and how handsome he was in his armor.

"He is handsome, Sansa," Joellyn admitted, "But I do not care for him.  I do not think I will be able to care for him.  He's not for me."

Sansa looked at her sadly, "Joellyn, I know that you love the man you spoke of in the garden, but you told me yourself that you two are never going to be able to be together."

Joellyn shook her head, "It's not that, Sansa.  I'll always treasure my time with Jon, but..."  At that Joellyn trailed off and put her hand over mouth.  She had not intended to tell Sansa that it was Jon that she was speaking of.

Sansa's eyes widened, "Joellyn, you did not tell me it was Jon!  Jon kissed you, when he knew you were engaged to Robb!?  He must really care for you.  Oh that it could have been.  We could be sisters!"

Joellyn was surprised by Sansa's reaction, but replied, "As I said, it could never have been.  I'm a Lannister, and he's a bastard.  More than that, he's gone to join the Night's Watch.  It doesn't matter.  Please, let's not speak of Jon anymore.  I hate that I told you it was him."

Sansa smiled sadly, "I won't bring him up again, my dear friend.  What do you know of Oberyn Martell?"

Joellyn shrugged in response, "I do not know anything except that he is the same age as Jaime and Cersei.  He's much older than me.  He probably has bastard children of his own already.  He never married.  He just had a parmour as far as I know.  Father said that she had died and he was now trying to find someone else."

Sansa chewed her lip, as if considering the two options, "Is there anyone who can tell you anything else about him?  Anything about his looks or his character?"

Joellyn nodded, "Tyrion probably can.  Cersei definitely can, but I do not think it is wise that I seek her out after my outburst during the battle."

She actually had not thought about what she had said to Cersei until now.  Cersei was surely furious with her.  Joellyn should not have let her anger get the best of her, but it did not matter much.  As unstable as her sister seemed, Cersei would either hold onto the grudge forever or put it out of her mind when the next big trouble arose.  At the moment, especially since their father had given Joellyn some choice in her future husband, Joellyn was betting that she would hold onto the grudge forever.  That just meant that she and Tyrion would be in the same company, and that was okay with Joellyn.

Sansa spoke again, bring Joellyn out of her musing, "You should speak to Tyrion, then.  He will be able to help you more than I could.  Besides, I'm sure you would wish to check on him and see if he is doing well."

Joellyn smiled, "You are most right, Sansa.  I shall visit you sometime later.  Thank you for being here for me."

The two girls hugged and Joellyn left to head back to her room.  She was sure that Tyrion and Shae would be done with their activities by now.  Joellyn thought more about Sansa.  Cersei did not give Sansa enough credit.  Sansa had grown smarter and wiser from her time in King's Landing.  She had learned that not all people could be trusted, and she had learned how to hide her true feelings to protect herself.  Cersei and Joffrey may have wanted to bring Sansa down, but the two of them had really just managed to make the girl stronger than she had been before.  It was nice to know that those two didn't manage to succeed, as far as Sansa was concerned anyway.