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4 ♤ Jesskas

Turning Pain Into Love
Jesskas

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Weeks...every single week...non-stop.

I feel guilty. I feel sorrow. I feel nothing of love or joy. Just...hatred.
They say it's not my fault. I wouldn't have known. But.........it is. Magnus, Reuben, both dead. Because of me. Axel sorrowful for his hero. Because of me. I don't deserve all this love...I don't....It iS MY FAULT!!!!

Jesse never ate. Jesse never drank. He stayed in his room, trapped like a fly. He would never come out...unless he really needed to, or someone had convinced him to. That someone was Lukas.

"J-Jesse?", Lukas asked carefully, opening the door slightly.

"...", Jesse didn't answer. All the blonde got was a simple rock back- and- forth in self-hatred.

Lukas sighed. He went into the room with a small glass of warm milk and some cookies. That was the only thing that would sooth Jesse for a little while.

"Look, Jesse, it isn't yo-", Lukas said before noticing red marks around Jesse's wrists.

"Jesse?", Lukas said before attracting his hand towards the brunette's wrist, trying not to startle him.

Lukas's hand was only one inch closer until Jesse pulled his wrist away. He looked at Lukas with a worried, yet terrified look on his face.

"J-Jesse, have you been-", Lukas said before being tightly hugged by the brunette.

"I-I-I d-didn't mean it! It WAS my fault! I shouldn't have took Magnus' armour, or let Reuben come!", Jesse cried before burying his face into Lukas's shirt, making it slightly damp from his tears.

Lukas waited a second for Jesse to get situated, then hugged him back, tightly. He didn't want to lose Jesse from blood loss. In fact, he didn't want to lose Jesse at all. He loved Jesse. They were the best of best-friends. Lukas just thought harder and harder, hugging Jesse tighter and tighter. Jesse had finally calmed down a little from the warm, tight, hug. Lukas rocked Jesse back and forth, shushing him as he would make little whimpers.

"L-Lukas?", Jesse slightly asked.

"Yes, Jesse?", Lukas answered back.

"Can...can I tell you something?", Jesse shyly asks.

"Sure, anything.", Lukas said loosening his hug on Jesse.

Jesse looked up at Lukas with slightly, teary eyes. He looked into Lukas' blue orbs while Lukas looked into his teary, green orbs.

"I-I love you...You always make me feel better some way. And that is why I love you. You make my pain go away.", Jesse looked at Lukas with a hopeful look and kissed him.

Lukas was surprised at first, but he then started to sink into the kiss. Kissing back passionately. They then pulled away looking into each other's eyes.

"I-I love you too, Jesse.", Lukas said smiling slightly at Jesse.

Jesse cuddled with Lukas before Lukas had gotten the cookies and milk. He gave Jesse a cookie and the glass of milk, while he just got a cookie. They both ate and cuddled again. Jesse was slightly falling asleep. Before he did so, he whispered a little sentence Lukas could barely make out before falling asleep.

"You truly make me happy..."

(Sorry not sorry X3)