Inside My Head

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Carly's POV

So currently I have absolutely no idea what I have been doing to pass the time. I vaguely remember hearing someone or maybe it was a fantasy, but whatever it was it told me I was looking better before I went to rehab. Such a wise voice. It coaxed me into the soft familiar self deprecating cushion that is mild depression. It's so familiar. I'm happy to be home.

I'm home. It feels so weird. They tried to trick me into believing that I'm good enough. And somehow they got me to believe them. Somehow I wake up in my bed. Somehow I got home too. Somehow I ran a shower got clean and managed to brush my teeth. Somehow I am still functioning. It's been going on like this since I ran into Trevor. Things have been rough. I still have school and work and it's so hard. Communicating with others is a function I can't seem to do. How did I do it before. It's so hard. Too hard. But Dean. He's the reason. I can do this. I can. It's so hard. I can't go today. Not to school. He's there.

My dad's become so nonchalant about me missing so much school. I stopped eating meals. It's better now. I'm staying small. Trevor likes that. It makes him happy.

And that's all I want.

Dean's POV

She's been gone. It's so hard to watch someone I care so deeply about suffer tremendously. She's missed eight consecutive days. My baby.

I love her so. I let her get away. How can I get her back. Oh Elisa. If she ever found out what's been going on in my head. I cannot.

"So, are you ready for tonight, man?!" Seth excitedly asked.

I nodded my head, faked a smile, and continued to pack my books for the day.

"Coach made us do a wicked load of conditioning. You think we can do it? Dude, Elisa and I saw an alien last night. Man, are you listening to a thing I'm saying?"

"Yeah, of course," I murmur as I crane my neck around the corner to look for her. Please. I need her so.

We need each other. I ignore Seth the entire day. He's talking my ear off. He knows me too well. He's going to ask about her if I don't hurry and apply myself. It's lunch time. I must converse.

Somehow I do it. Somehow I manage to convince Seth that nothing is wrong. Somehow he believes my lame ass excuse of it just being nerves for the math test. Somehow I'm out side of her house.

Carly's POV

I spend my day sitting on the window bench in my room. Things have been worse. That's what I have been continuously been telling myself to try and remain mentally stable. This is hard. So hard. I want to text someone. Tell someone that things aren't okay. I don't think Taylor knows quite the negative effect her friendship has had on me. But I need someone to atleast talk to. But I can't remember. What has been happening? I need someone's help. Please. If last year wouldn't have happened Elisa would be my wingman, but people change. I want her here with me.

I want her with me. She keeps me sane. I need Elisa. Please someone. Call her. I find myself outside. How am I doing this. Sitting on the porch. Reading. I feel better.

I watch my elderly neighbor across the street. Mrs. Young plant her petunias. I think it's too early for those.

My phone vibrates. *Are you feeling better? Or would you like to see a doctor?* from my dad. I love him so. I reply hastily and tell him that I'm feeling better; which is not entirely a lie. It's too hot out here. I'm going inside.

It's 3:00 school's ending. Maybe I should man up and call Elisa. Apologize for being an ass last year. Rekindle our friendship. I sit on the floor next to the door and watch the birds on the telephone line. I hear someone approaching the house. I move my head slightly as to not alert them to the fact that someone's home. I see Dean.

He looks miserable. Just as miserable as me.

We still need each other. Yes.

Dean's POV

She smiles slightly when she opens the door. A crooked kind of smile. One that says I need you.

"I miss you Carlz," I pause, then finish. "Tremendously."

"Sit with me," she says as she takes my arm and leads me inside.

A/N: This is beyond short, and I realize that. This is the week before exams where I go to school. I'm so ready for winter break! I hope this is satisfying & I may go back and change it if I have more time. And explain a little more about what really happened 8 after noons ago. Love you guys! Thanks for reading and voting! As always please point out errors or discrepancies I want this short story to make sense. Thanks again! I'll try to update soon.