should i? | j.jk

chapter 28 pt.2 - should i confess?

2193 words horray ;)

YOUR POV
It has been minutes since we've sit on this place together in silence. It was such an awkward silence.

I honestly dont know what i'm feeling right now.

A part of me is happy and excited that i'm in one group with jungkook; meanwhile the other half of me feels guilty, mad, weird, awkward, uncourage and many much more bad feelings compiling into one feeling.

"Uhm.." i look up from my feet to jungkook, who i guess feels awkward too. "So.. what are we gonna do?" He asked me.

I shrugged as a respond, not knowing how to act.

Should i be acting cool and be ignorant towards him? Or should i be acting normal and talk to him?

This is driving me nuts.

A finger was snap right in front of my eyes making me pretty shock.

"Yah, what do you think you're doing?" Jungkook chuckled while giving me his bunny teeth, that i've been missing for ages.

Fuck, what am i feeling? I could feel the atmosphere getting hot-

"(Y/n)? You sick?" Jungkook suddenly lend out his hand and was about to carress my blushing cheeks.

But i stopped him from doing so.

Before he got the chance to carress my cheek, i stood up and left the class. Not knowing where my feet brought me to.

Why? Why do you do this jungkook?

I was so speechless. Seeing him again makes my world upside down.

I miss everything about him. Especially his presence. His presence that i've been longing for to hug, but i cant.

I went to the restroom to look at my red face as i stare at my reflection in the mirror.

When are my feelings gonna stop? I'm tired of having this up and down feelings.

I'm tired of everything. Why cant i just have a normal love story like jin and sana? Why cant i? Why does my life needs to be so complicated?!

I groan and messed my hair as i was frustrated of everything.

I want to end this feeling.

I'm so sick of this.

But how do i end this?

Should i be avoiding jungkook and slowly move on to taemin? That might be a good idea.

Sorry.. jungkook.

I'm sorry for i guess ending our friendship. I'm sorry for everything. I'm gonna try to forget you from now on.

I remember our memories that we've created.

I remember that first morning, where we were still awkward. And slowly we started becoming close. You and i spent the whole day together at the themepark. Only both of us. You made me feel special that day and that was the day where the seed of love for you started to grow in my heart.

I've enjoyed the time being with you. I wanted to be more than friends. But not you. You just wanted to be friends with me. That's it. I understand jungkook.

I remembered too where you suddenly cried at the bus on our way back home from the themepark. I wanted to question it again to you but i guess i got no time.

Also where taemin almost took my first kiss. But you, you rescued me from him. Thank you for being my hero that day.

And the day where i finally know who you liked. It tears me apart so much that i've decided to avoid you. I was crazy in love that time. I cried for you for so many times, because i love you.