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Simon's P.O.V.

I woke up and my back felt like absolute crap. The light was shining directly in my eyes and everything felt like crap. I started to blink so that I could get my eyes use to the light.

I looked at Josh who was still unconscious. He was beautiful and I will always love him.

"Hey, Ethan and Tobi left last night but I decided to stay. I thought I'd tell you this in case you notice that their voices aren't here. Anyway, I'm sorry this happened. I'm sorry I allowed this to happen to you. I love you so much Josh. I love you so unbelievably much. I just wish you were here with me." I said grabbing his hand, "squeeze my hand if you can hear me. Please squeeze my hand."

Nothing. No movement. Nothing.

"Maybe you can hear me and just can't move. I don't know. I just want you here. I want to here your voice, I want to cuddle you and I want to tell you that you are loved. You deserve the world Joshua Bradley, you deserve to be happy and you deserve to live that life that you deserve. I hate watching everything just fall I front of us. I want to be with you. For however long that may be. Who knows? All I know is that I want to spend the rest of my existence with you." I said as I put down my head on his leg and started to cry.

I felt sudden movement and I sat up to see Josh's hand moving ever so slightly.

I got up and wiped my tears and ran out trying to find anyone to tell them. I couldn't find a nurse nor a doctor so I ran back inside to see the beautiful boy I loved most.

His eyes had red all around them, but all I could look at was the beautiful green, that turned into a blue. The adorable look of happiness that spread across his face and how it shimmered in his eyes. The way he was smiling though he was surely in pain.

I felt myself start to tear up as I wiped away the tears trying to stay calm as he smiled even more.

"I'm sorry I let this happen and I'm sorry that you felt the way that you-"

"Stop." He said barely even being able to breathe.

"I can't, this is all my fault." I said breaking into tears.

"I heard everything you said Simon. I'm sorry." He said trying to breathe but failing.

"Stop talking, I'm going to get a doctor. I'm sorry Joshua." I said as I ran out and ran to the desk.

"I need a doctor for Joshua Bradley. He's woken up and can barely breathe." I said as the nurse nodded and called up a doctor.

A doctor and a few nurse ran inside taking care of Josh as I watched from afar.

How did this all happen? I remember three years ago, it was all seven of us making these stupid GTA videos because we thought we were so funny. All of us just laughing and having the time of our lives. Now, here I am siting in a hospital waiting for the boy I love most to get better.

~~~~~~~~~

The doctor and nurses ended up leaving a little while after. All the guys came and we ended up taking and surrounding Josh. The room full of laughter.

"You know what I just remembered?" Tobi said as we all got quiet, "today is the Sidemen anniversary."

He said as we all looked around the room as we all just smiled.

"Yeah it is, and here we all are. Together. Once again." Ethan said smiling as we all just sighed in agreement.

"Thanks." Josh said in a faint voice.

He still couldn't talk that well, but as long as he was here with us made us all happy.

"For what?" We all said in unison making us laugh.

"For being here. For supporting me even if I did try to kill myself. For loving me even though I may be fucked up." He said trying to catch breath.

"Hey, that's what family's for. We are all family here. Some brothers, others lovers. But we are here, together and that's what counts." I said grabbing his hand and looking around the room.

Harry and Vik sitting on the couch, Vik cuddled up into his chest. Tobi sitting next to me and manny sitting next to him. The Cals and Ethan sitting on the other couch just smiling. Lewis and Freya, leaning on the wall as Freya rested her head on Lewis's shoulder. And then JJ with the biggest grin leaning on the chair behind me.

"Even though a tragedy may have just occurred, we are still here. All still together. Maybe some happier than others but we are still united as a group. Nothing is going to change that." JJ said as I looked up at him and he looked at me.

"It's mad ain't it. That somehow we all met through the internet and are still together." Harry said as we all laughed and nodded our heads in agreement.

"Truly mad." Josh said as we calmed down the laughter and sat in the silence of each other's presence.

~~~~~~~
A/N: three years, that's actually mad. They all met through the internet and are all still such amazing friends. It's crazy to think that just a year and a couple of months ago, I never even had watched a sidemen video. Now here I am sitting in a sidemen shirt, with my Sidemen book and posters, a bunch of other clothing in my closet and a humongous love for these boys writing about them. To think that it has just been a year and a few months that I've been watching them and I love them this much is insane.

So many of you have been fans of them for so long, since they started and I find that to be crazy. It's amazing how seven, beautiful, amazing guys can make millions so happy just by playing videos games and talking about random shit. It actually amazes me. I love the boys so much and I am so proud of them. I actually cried when I got there book last Saturday. My mom thought I was insane. It just goes to show you how much they affect us all.

I also wanted to bring up that it has almost been a year since I started writing minizerk books, my first book How Do I Say These a Three Words? Which was published on November tenth is at 20k reads and has been out for nearly a year. That's mind boggling. I am definently going to do something for you guys that day because so many of you have been supporting me since that day. It's mad to think that a year ago I was on Wattpad looking through the minizerk books (which was only two at the time) and felt the necessity to write a book so that others would start writing minizerk books and now here I am, a year later with what 18 minizerk books completed? That's insane. It's insane to see how many of you have been here and how many of you enjoy my horrible writing.

But yeah, thank you all and congratulations to the boys 🍾🎉🍾 you go!!!

I'm going to stop this stupid rant and stop typing, just wanted to say that I love you guys and I'm so happy that I decided on watching these guys and fell in love with both Simon and Josh and the ship minizerk, or else I wouldn't be writing this. Anyway, bye!

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