A life lived as an illusion... This is the dilemma of Alison who woke up from a coma (in chapter Waking Up to Reality Pt1) to the fact that everything she had experienced and lived through was made up. Now she has to accept this fact as she moves on...
[Verse 1:] Baby I don't blame you For being in the clubs Getting all that love Because you're so beautiful God made you to show that off, oh Now I ain't ever been the jealous type of guy But I want you to myself, I can't lie I know we ain't on no one on one thing But baby, It should change Cause when I be out with other chicks I be thinking bout you And when you be out on dates you be texting me too Telling me to come pick you up when he drop you off I pray to God he ain't breaking you off
[Hook:] I don't want nobody but you Kissin' on my tattoos I don't want nobody but me Talkin to you Until you fall asleep We better stop playing (We better stop playing game) Before we mess around and someone gets hurt I don't want nobody but you (nobody but you) Kissin' on my tattoos
[Bridge:] Nobody But you Kissin' on me Kissin' on me [x4]
[Verse 2:] All my homies wanna know what's up with us They can't believe that I'm kicking it with just one girl But I'm cool with that Them pretty eyes and that smile Girl I'm a fool for that (yeah I'm a fool for that) Cause when I be out with other chicks I be thinking bout you And when you be out on dates you be texting me too Telling me to come pick you up when he drop you off I pray to God he ain't breaking you off
[Hook]
[Bridge]
K I S S I N G On My T A T T O O S [x4]
Emily finished breaking eye contact with me.Today will be the last day of recording and we just wore something casual.
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Emily POV
I walk over to Ali gonna hug her and she just walks off.
''What's wrong''
''Anger
It is the vexing of the soul A swelling of the veins waiting to explode It's like the rushing of blood to the head Saying things, you would rather left unsaid
Anger I am beside myself Tossing and frowning, I lost my head I need to stop and find me again a calming of the soul and tranquility within and cease this war that rages in
Anger let it not be said that I unleashed the monster under my bed anger, please stay out of my head Control, Calm and Purpose That's my request instead ''
''What do you mean?''
''I feel like I should me angry with you about something and I know I'm feeling pain from something you did but I don't know what''she said tears threatening to spill.I hug her and all I felt was Guilt.
The guilt sat not on her chest but inside her brain. What she had done she could not un-do. She could make amends in subtle ways, but confession was out of the question, even to her priest. Only in her silent prayers could she speak her heart to God and beg for His mercy. She didn't feel like she deserved the love of Jesus Christ but she clung to it and hung the shreds of her sanity on it. She prayed that one day she would feel removed from her sin, washed clean of it, but the guilt was a stain on her, an ugly scar. She had to believe in redemption and rebirth, she had to leave her deeds in past and move on. The guilt is ice in my guts. It could be a hundred degrees out and I'd still be frozen on the inside. I can't melt it on my own, I can't shift it at all. I need Him to bring his warmth, to show me that I can be better, that I can still serve Him. I wanted to be perfect so much, even as a little kid, and it kills me that I wasn't. I wanted to follow His ways from my earliest memories and I still strayed. So though it's hard to move past my mistakes, I own them, hold them as my own, and accept that He still loves me regardless. I only hope that by the time I'm done I can feel like I earned it.
