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I tap my fingers against the car window letting out a huge breath.
"Still nervous?" Mike asks from the backseat.
I shake my head 'no' as I continue to stare outside the streets. It is a sunny afternoon and we're on our way to the address we've searched that might lead to where my parents are.
"Okay fine," I say, "a little nervous. But I need to do this, right?"
Both guys nods at my direction as Thayer continue his focus on the road. I watch as the streets we pass by become nothing but a blur in seconds. I wait, -- nervously and impatiently -- for the time to pass and get this all over with.
Seeing my parents. Finding answers. Knowing what happened those almost nine years ago that passed.
A week ago, Thayer and Mike did their research about the whereabouts of my parents. And successfully, they managed to track them down and found their home address.
I don't remember exactly what they looked like. The flashbacks that has been occuring at the back of my mind shows nothing but a blur.
All I know are their names.
And I don't know if I'm ever ready to face them either.
But I need answers, and maybe reassurance.
✂------------------------------------------
I sit uncomfortably on the couch between Mike and Thayer as Georgia -- a.k.a my mother -- prepares a drink at the kitchen.
We're all silent. None of us know what the proper words to say or do. I nervously tap my lap with my fingers gently, slowly feeling lightheaded as I look around the place.
The moment the front door opened, revealing a tired-looking and fifty-ish something woman infront of me, I felt a pang of fear churning my insides. She looked confused at first, probably wondering who would be knocking at her door at half past two in the afternoon but the moment her eyes focused on me for about three whole minutes, her eyes widened -- in shock probably or maybe knowing me, maybe even with horror -- causing her to lift her right hand to cover her mouth.
And that was when I almost fainted, my mouth not abling me to force any words out of my mouth. That's when I realized that I haven't even thought about what would I say or what would I do once I came face to face with my parents. With my mom right now.
"Scar- Scarlett?" she had mouthed, my name turning out as a question escaping her lips.
I looked away, not being able to look at her for a second and I don't know if that's because of shame or guilt or unfamiliarity since being away from my parents for nine years had made me a stranger to them instead of daughter. Had made them stranger to me than parents.
