Daughter ✯ Kellic

Chapter Four

My memories came rushing back to me, but I shoved them to the very back of my mind, attempting to ignore both the bad and the good. If I talk to him with any memory of us together, good or bad, I won't be able to focus on what he's saying; I'll be too busy remembering what we had, no matter if it would make me cry or smile or anything else. I attempted to have an open mind about this, even if it's a bad decision.

Jaime smiles and offers his hand for me to shake. I awkwardly oblige, unable to form a smile due to what his hands used to do to me before I broke off our relationship. I shudder slightly once the formal greeting is over but he doesn't seem to notice. "Wow..." he states quietly, "it's been so damn long." I simply nod.

"Are you okay? You seem pretty distant." He reaches out slightly and I naturally flinch away, unable to stop my reflexes. "Vic..." he says quietly, lowering his arm. "You're still caught up over that little mess, aren't you? You're scared of me."

"It's not like I could just pretend you abusing me never happened," I violently whisper, regretting my choice of even talking to him. He cringes slightly at my words, but I don't regret spitting them out. Am I an idiot or something? This man beat me for over two years and he expects me to not be scared of him or his fists? It's not like I was doing anything wrong by trying to protect myself from potential harm.

"I-" he cuts himself off and clears his throat slightly before continuing, "I don't do those things anymore, Vic. I've changed, I promise. Being around these kids opened my eyes even more than when you left me. I know I have issues, that's why I sought help. I have two therapists: a regular one, and an anger therapist. I've made such amazing progress, Vic, and I would never do the things I used to."

I give Jaime a skeptical look. The kind and convincing tone, the concerned look; is he actually telling the truth? Has he really changed for the better? "And I should believe you why exactly?" I question, my voice getting a little less anger filled. He lets out a light sigh and avoids my eyes for a moment before looking back at me, he himself looking very emotional over this subject.

"I've hurt so many people. Vic, I could never do it again. The pain, the marks...I hate that shit now," he says, not really offering an answer. "I promise you I've changed. I know everyone says that, but we were together for almost four years, you have to believe me."

"Yeah? For half of our relationship you intentionally hurt me without consequence," I snap, crossing my arms. "You know what? Fuck you. You haven't changed, and I don't want any part in your stupid little pity party. I'm done here, Jaime." With that, I attempt to walk out of the school, only to be followed.

Jaime grabs my shoulder and turns me around. I freeze up at the feeling of him even making contact with any part of my body. "Vic, please hear me out!" he practically begs. "I want to take you out sometime and catch up. I don't want it to be like this. I promise I've changed, and I can prove it. Let me take you to dinner." I roll my eyes.

"I'm seeing someone now, Jaime, I don't need to go on a stupid date with your sorry ass," I reply. He looks crushed, but I'm not phased by his hurt expression.

"It won't be a date, it'll just be catching up, like old friends," Jaime attempts to explain. I take a moment to actually consider it. When we were together, he would have already beat my ass by this point, but he hasn't. He hardly even laid a hand on me, only to get my attention when I was trying my hardest to escape. Has he really changed?

"Fine." He smiles. "Under one condition: if you even lay a finger on me, I'm kicking you where the sun don't shine so hard that you'll never have kids."

"Sunday, then? You live in the same place?" he questions. I nod, almost reluctantly. Am I making a bad decision? "I'll pick you up at noon. Unblock my number so I can call ahead of time." And with that, he finally walks away.

• • •

I was scared to leave Mike alone again. It was about time that I told Kellin what had happened to Mike and what role he played in it, but I don't know if that would even make me feel relatively safer about being away from my younger brother. But I had made an agreement with Jaime and we are going out tomorrow night to "catch up", so this is my opportunity to talk to Kellin.

I know he's upstairs, and I hate to drag him away from his daughter, but I might as well get it all out while it's fresh in my mind. Mike's in his room, so I don't have to worry about him hearing if Kellin and I begin arguing. With a small sigh, I trudge up the stairs and walk to Copeland's nursery, anxious about this whole ordeal. "Hey, Kells?" I ask quietly from the doorway.

He sets the baby down in her crib and steps closer to me. "Yeah?" he questions. I walk back so that he can follow me out of the nursery and to our room. I bite my bottom lip in silence for a second before meeting his eyes again.

"I really need to talk to you about something," is what I choose to begin with. I grab his hand and lead him over to our bed, motioning for him to sit next to me when I take my own seat. Worry quickly turns to concern in his eyes. "It's about Mike...And it's also about you." I pause slightly between the two sentences, trying to structure my words properly in my mind before speaking.

I continue, "Mike was - he was, uh, taking pills that weren't prescribed for him, which is pretty dangerous, and I, of all people, would definitely know." Kellin furrows his eyebrows as I nervously run a hand through my hair and clear my throat. He must not have known about the pills, either. "There was something else too, though, just recently." His eyes widen.

"Wha-what was it?" I awkwardly stare at him, rapidly blinking but unable to figure out why. I'm not about to cry or anything, I'm just blinking. Quietly, as if I'm not supposed to hear he mutters, "Oh, shit." By this point, he must know what I'm talking about.

"It was heroin, Kellin, and there's only one place I can think of that he would get something like that," I state plainly. He gnaws on his bottom lip and nods, looking down to the floor. "He had an allergic reaction and nearly killed himself." His head whips back up, his eyes wide with an unnamed emotion. "That's where he was, in the hospital," I continue, making each sentence short and to the point.

"I - I didn't know you could even be allergic to something like that..." he says quietly, his eyes glistening with premature tears.

"Funny, Mike said the same thing." He looks back down, probably out of guilt. "You don't even understand how pissed I am that you lied to me, and then had the audacity to leave that shit somewhere that anyone could get to it," I say, managing to keep my voice down. "I found him on the fucking floor, passed out, with your own daughter holding the needle. You think that's what I wanted to come home to?"

"Copeland had a needle?!" he asks, his tone managing to get angrier than mine in the process. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?!"

"Because, this little argument - or whatever you want to call it - we're having, I didn't want to have it," I reply calmly. "I don't understand how you could turn this against me, anyway, Kellin; I told you to do something, you didn't, and it put my brother and your daughter in danger. How hard was it to just listen to me?!" He gets up and I follow, not ready to end this just yet.

"Fine, then it's over," he says. "We don't have to argue. I made a mistake, okay? Is that what you want from me; an apology? Then I'm sorry, Vic!" He takes a deep, angry breath and slowly releases it. "Just answer me this: where's everything now?"

"Gone, like it was supposed to be a while ago," I reply, crossing my arms. "I'm glad to see you can still manage to think about yourself during this discussion," I mutter under my breath, silently hoping he doesn't hear. Except my hopes weren't hopeful enough, and he did hear.

"Excuse me? This whole 'discussion' happened in the first place because you got your precious little panties in a twist and took me for an idiot!" he snaps back. Then, he shoves me, which is not something I have much of a tolerance for. "Oh my god, Vic, I just - I didn't mean-" he tries to apologize, but my expression remains shocked, and I'm not feeling like I'm about to just forgive him.

"Save it," I snap, storming back downstairs. I quickly grab my jacket and car keys and leave the house, slamming the front door closed behind me.