Help (Narry Storan)

Chapter 10

It's not like it's been a few weeks or anything...

Really though, I'm sorry for not updating, and I really don't have an excuse either...sue me. 

Anyways, yea. My friends are mean and try to get me to update all the time, and that's part of the reason why I DON'T. *cough cough* Jay and Jenny *cough cough* Jk, jk I love you guys <3

Well then

Enjoy xx

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Harry's Pov 

I'm an idiot. For two reasons. One, I suggested my feelings towards him. Two, I got disappointed when he didn't understand what I was trying to point out. At least I could cover it up as a compliment, that was a somewhat plus. But I can't let myself do that again. Point out my new-found feelings, I mean. It's stupid. I'm stupid. I don't need to complicate matters even more. I need to work on getting my friendship back with Niall if anything, and I don't think I'm exactly doing the best at that. 

I sat there for a while, debating with myself if I should go out and talk to him, or give him space. I decided on the latter and stayed in my room all day, doing absolutely nothing. Since there weren't any electronics allowed, there wasn't much that I could do. Just stare out the window until I fell asleep to dreams of the little blond Irishman.

Niall's Pov

I scratched at my wrists as I walked along some trail outside of our cabin. I made sure to keep the cabin in sight as I walked around, admiring the nature before me. It was so different from the city, and was one of the only reasons why I tolerated this whole trip. Even Harry was making me frustrated. All of a sudden, he was extremely hell bent on talking to me. Couldn't he see that he was driving me crazy? I can't fall for him, I can't! I wouldn't be able to live with myself if he ever got hurt because of me. 

I looked down at my wrist and a twisted smile shaped on my lips at the sight. My nails had broken the skin there and little of droplets of blood surfaced from the cuts. I stared at them for a while, the smile never leaving my face. I knew that it wasn't good, but after 2 months, I had realized how much I had missed it, and when I first did it a couple days ago, the relief was so great that it shocked me. But now the addiction was back, and stronger than ever. The urge to release was too much, and even though I knew better, I just couldn't stop. Harry had checked my bag for sharp objects and was watching me like a hawk, so all I really had were my nails. Anything would do though, because the pain just felt so good. 

I watched as the blood dripped down my arm, and a sense of peace washed over me. I both hated and loved my scars. I hated them because they showed just how weak I was, but I love them because they also show how strong I am. 

I stayed for a while, thinking, before walking back to the cabin. It was already dark out. When did that happen? 

I opened the door and almost ran into Zayn, who was pacing back and forth and chewing on his nails. When he saw me walk in, his head snapped up and he glared at me, half relieved and half angry. 

"Niall! Where were you? We looked everywhere but couldn't find you! Harry's worried out of his mind! He said that you looked mad when you left, and was afraid that you were lost, and..." He trailed off, his anger fading and his features softening. "Are you okay?" He lifted his arm as if to comfort me, but let if fall when he saw my how cold my eyes were. 

"I don't need a damn babysitter." I glare at him before pushing past him and walking towards my room. 

"We were just worried about you..." I hear him speak softly behind me, and I'm shocked. Nobody ever speaks back to me. I turn around and glare at him. 

"Well don't be! It's not like any of you cared before, why now?" Anger had taken over my shock, and I saw Zayn cower, but not back off.

"You need to grow up Niall. Life isn't all rainbows and butterflies, there's a thing called reality, and you need to get your head out of your ass and get used to it. We do care, but this is getting ridiculous, soon it'll get to a point where we won't care anymore." Anger was making my vision red and all I felt was rage as stomped over to Zayn and slammed him against a wall. I ignored his pained whimper and continued to yell at him. 

"You have no say in my life! I bet you'd be the same way if you had gone through the same thing as me!" He was clearly scared, but curiosity sparked in his caramel eyes. 

"Maybe if you told us what happened, we could help you!" Panic rushed through me, and my walls that I had worked so hard to build started to crack. I shook my head quickly.

"I can't tell you! No, I can't tell anyone, I have to protect Harry..." I quickly snap my mouth shut, surprised that I let myself say that. Tears start to blur my vision, and I let go of Zayn, backing off slowly. He raised his eyebrows, opening his mouth to say something, but I don't let him. I run out of the room and into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of vodka before running upstairs and into my room. I heard Zayn call out my name, but I ignore him and slam the door to my room. I fall against it, finally letting the tears cascade down my cheeks, and I stay there sobbing quietly until I hear someone clear their throat. My head snaps up to see Harry awkwardly looking at the ground. His face is red and I gulp as I look in his eyes and realize that he had just witnessed everything that just happened.