To Be With You | hoshi

xxvi

Did I just get dumped? Forget everything?

"Mingyu, wait!" I chased after him. The school bell rang. Students swarm in the halls. Everyone rushed to their respective classrooms. Even if Mingyu's tall, I can't see him as I feel myself getting smaller and smaller. The crowd seemed to fade but I felt like being squished. My chest feels tight. I leaned onto the wall and breathed in all the air I can.

The hall becomes empty again, and I break down. 

I cried. I don't even know why I did. Is it sadness from Mingyu? Or have I just got enough in dealing with everything?

I should be happier that I broke up with Mingyu because I know that I can't like him as much as he likes me. That would end his misery with me. Mingyu is such a great guy, I don't deserve him. 

"I should wash my face...", I spoke to nobody.

I looked at the mirror and saw how red my face was. How embarrassing to show up in class like this.... as if I'm still going in there....

The walk home felt like a thousand miles. The first thing I did was lock myself in my room. I wrapped myself with the blanket and stared into space. 

I was hungry as the hours passed by but was too lazy to get up. I am tired but not physically. If only this was a dream, so that I can wake up to see us in a better light. But after sleeping, everything will just be the same.

It was getting dark, the only light came from the windows. A spray of orange was provided by  the setting sun.

Two knocks came from my door. "Miyoung-ah? You in there?", Soonyoung's voice came through. More knocks....

I slowly opened my door. I looked up to see a worried expression on Soonyoung's face.

"Ah, mwoya? Do you need something?", I tried to casually say.

He cleared his throat before speaking. "Mind if I come in?", he asked.

I opened the lights. He sat on my bed while I stood by the door. We were awkwardly silent. 

"Well, how are you?", he asked, followed by an awkward chuckle. 

"Um, I'm fine.", I answered. He patted the spot beside him. "I'm good. I can stand here." But he gave me a look and patted it again.

I sat beside him. "Tell me everything.", he said.

I looked at him then at the floor. "I don't want to be here.", I quietly said.

Soonyoung's eyes widened. "What are you saying? You belong here!"

"But everything happened since I got here!", I exclaimed. "I wanted to live quietly. Live in the shadows. Not getting caught up in a teen drama, playing the female role."

He stayed quiet. "I didn't want a boyfriend in the first place.", I continued.  "I guess it was stupid of me to let Mingyu in and out of my life. Now I'm here, crying because I got dumped. But that's not why I'm crying. I'm crying because I don't know. I had to think about what I do about Mingyu and you. My decision is the worst. Mingyu's so angry at me right now, and I'm letting you expect something when there's nothing. I let you do things to me, things Mingyu hasn't even done, but you don't even know if I like you back.

I'm sorry, but I can't deal with romance." After saying all that, I couldn't stop the warm tears. Soonyoung didn't say anything. He  just opened his arms and welcomed me in a hug.

It's weird how people cry even more when they are hugged. He was patting my head and kept quiet.

"Soonyoung,", I said.

"Mm?"

"I'm sorry..."

"I understand." He pulled away from me and gave me a reassuring smile. "Do know that I love you...

as a brother."

A/N: ㅠㅠ y'all can kill me. i don't update oh so regularlyyyy. and i've given you a shortttttttt chap once again. mianhae..... saranghae, yongseohae!!~ 

imma just say this here that this would be a new "arc" or something like that in the story. idk if it's long or short depends on how i feel like writing. 

I WOULD LIKE TO THANK THE 7K+ VIEWS "To Be With You" HAS. I WILL GIVE OUT ALL MY SARANG TO YOU ( ˘ ³˘)♥. THANKYOUUUUU.