Ethereal

Twenty one

It had been a month or 2 since Camila made amends with her mom. Camila ultimately forgave her mother. Sinu agreed to move back to Miami, closer to Lauren's house and further then Alejandro's house. She was glad to have her little sister back. For a while, the hope of seeing Sofi again kept her strong. But now, she felt like nothing could keep her strong. She felt like she was slipping back into her old habits.

"Oh fuck." Lauren heard Camila mutter from inside the bathroom. She was standing against the door of the bathroom with her ear pressed to the wooden entrance. She usually wouldn't eavesdrop, but she was worried about Camila. She had to take precautions.

"Um Camila? What are you doing?" Lauren hesitantly knocked on the door. The sound of the scale hitting the floor came next. Lauren immediately perked up. "Camila open the door please." She pleaded.

"Uh yea, I'll be out in a second." Camila slid the scale back between the wall and the bathroom sink. She sat down against the wall with her head in her hands. She could get the number out of her mind. 93. That meant she had gained weight, she was actually getting better.

It had been a while since she made the choice to get better. But she didn't feel like Lauren cared much. Maybe this was all for no reason. She had countless panic attacks and breakdowns, for no reason.

Camila flung the bathroom door open and shoved past Lauren. The green eyed girl stumbled back in confusion. Camila grabbed a sweatshirt and left the her room, without saying a word to Lauren.

Camila pounded her fists on Dinah's room door, tears already fells down her cheeks. She could feel the panic rising in her chest. The door opened and Camila came face to face with Normani.

"Hey, what's wrong Mils?" Normani wrapped her fingers around Camila tiny wrist and pulled her in and onto the bed, where Dinah was sitting.

The Polynesian immediately jump up from her spot and over to Camila. Dinah pulled her in and wrapped her arms around the small frame comfortingly yet protectively at the same time. Camila balled Dinah's shirt in her hand. The tall girl took a few steps back so that they were on the bed. Camila laid in between Dinah and Normani. Their facial expressions both feigned worry.

"10 pounds. I gained a whole 10 pounds." Camila curled herself into a ball and let out a heart wrenching sob. Dinah couldn't stand to see her best friend in so much pain.

"Mani. This is going to be bad, I'll call you later alright? I have everything under control." Normani nodded and smiled apologetically towards Dinah, she placed a kiss on Camila's forehead and left the hotel room. Dinah sighed and ran her hand through the smaller girl's hair.

"Mila, you could gain 100 pounds and still be sti-" Camila cut Dinah off.

"I worked so hard for this! I've spent the past 5 years loosing all this weight! A-and now im just going to suddenly "get better"? This is such bullshit! Lauren doesn't care! I was doing this for her. She doesn't care, I can't fucking do this!" Camila let out another sob as she finished.

"Camila please stop. You're gorgeous. You're stick thin. I literally weigh 50 pounds more then you do. You do need to get better. You really do. And you're doing great." Dinah addressed the younger girl.

"No Dinah I don't think you understand. You could gain weight and look completely the same. When I gain, I get so big. I'm a fucking pufferfish Dinah!" The Polynesian laughed at Camila's analogy and shook her head. Dinah couldn't understand what was going through Camila's mind. She couldn't wrap her head around the fact that Camila Cabello thought she was fat.

Camila almost recovered from her eating disorder when she met the girls. She used to have very little problems with pigging out with Dinah. But one day it was like a switch went off inside her. She suddenly stopped eating. She stayed in her bunk instead of watching movies with the girls. Dinah could hear the small girl's sobs coming from her bunk in the middle of the night. Camila ran to the bathroom silently after every meal. I light suddenly went off in Camila's eyes. And Dinah was afraid it was happening again.