Ethereal

twenty eight

"Can I call Lauren?" Camila asked timidly. She had just finished up breakfast and she was one of the last ones out of the cafeteria.

"No sweetheart. You will see her in 4 days. I promise you can go that long without talking to your best friend." Dr. King reassured.

"Okay." Camila was more soft spoken now that she was in treatment. Before she would have put up a fight and corrected her and told Dr. King that Lauren was her girlfriend. But now she only managed to put out one word answers or short sentences.

"She's my girlfriend." Camila muttered under her breath. The blonde ignored her and continued walking down the long hallway.

"Okay so the schedule for today is breakfast, which is already done. Then therapy, after you can do what ever you would like to, except skip lunch and dinner obviously." Camila groaned. Group therapy was easily her least favorite thing. It was the thing that basically got her anorexia admitted to the world. And she didn't see in a point in it, but she thought that about everything.

"No shit. I don't even understand why I'm here." Camila rolled her eyes. This is one of the first times she's actually spoke up since she's been here.

"I feel like I'm going to throw up." Camila put her hand on her head a stopped walking.

Another thing that made Camila's experience at the hospital worse was that she was adjusting to her antidepressants. They made her feel nauseous. They also made her irritable which is most likely why she didn't really talk to anyone. Her insomnia was worse then ever and every time she did sleep, she woke up with an extremely dry mouth.

"Well we can't have that. Do you want to go back to your room and rest for a couple minutes? You can't skip group therapy." Camila nodded and headed into the direction of the hospital room.

They turned around and walked back towards her room. Camila passed the cafeteria on the way in. She peeked her head in and saw there was only one person left in the room. She usually spent most of her time in the cafeteria. It took her a while to even convince herself to eat. When she was done with her food she was almost always the last one in the cafeteria. It was always her or another girl named Aliyah. The other girl had dark brown hair, she looked about 16. She was extremely thin, but that was to be expected. If camila had to give a guess, she'd say the girl was around 70 pounds. Camila and Aliyah flashed each other encouraging smiles at times, but they never talked to each other. Camila had a feeling they never would, they both obviously felt the same way about being in the hospital. They wanted to do what they had too so they could get out.

Camila was encouraged to find friends who understood how she felt. She didn't see the point in doing so. They would only know each other for a couple days. They only let you stay in the hospital until they found a bed for you at an actual eating disorders clinic. But in Camila's case, she was just going home. She knew she would never talk to any of these people ever again. So she sat alone at breakfast, lunch, dinner, and group therapy sessions. Camila has only ever spoken to 2 different people since she arrived and she intended on keeping it that way.

Camila got back to her room and flopped on the bed. She thought it was pretty stupid for their nurses and doctors to leave them alone in their rooms. She could easily make herself throw up without anyone noticing. Not that she was going to.

Camila felt an obligation to follow through with this treatment. The hospital bills were going to be expensive. Which wasn't a problem for the girls, but Camila felt bad. She felt like she had an obligation to get better for Dinah. So that the Polynesian could have her old Camila back. And Lauren too. She hated the fact that the girls have seen her at her lowest point. She knew she had to get better for herself though, so everyone told her. But she'd be lying if she said she didn't cheat her way out of eating since she's been there. Some things were never going to change.