The Side You Don't See (Yaoi Boyxboy)

16

Kizumi was silent. Much, much more silent than he'd ever been at the dinner table with us before. In fact, I was sure that he hadn't even said a single thing besides a simple 'thank you' when my Mom poured him a glass of water before sitting down. Usually he was the one chatting up my parents and I with questions or having us tell him stories...but today he was quiet. Yuji was the one who took his place tonight, keeping the conversation going smoothly at the table. I couldn't help but worry, though.

He'd been quiet ever since the movie started. I knew it had something to do with Yuji, for sure. I was more than sure. Earlier when he came back with our popcorn for the movie, I saw the look on his face and it honestly scared me. My heart genuinely rattled when I saw how hostile his face had been when he saw that Yuji was in his spot. He had looked like he was going to stab someone, but I'd luckily acted quickly and snapped him out of it. He hadn't made that sort of face in a long, long time. In fact, I only remember seeing him make that face from far away in the halls when other people were trying to pick a fight with him.

Maybe that was why it had scared me so much. Seeing it up close and so suddenly...terrifying. What I felt lost on was the fact that he'd had acted that way over something so simple. Was he really that angry because Yuji sat on the couch next to me? Was his jealousy really that bad? What was I supposed to do to fix it? I couldn't just ditch Yuji and say 'go find someone else to hang out with'. Maybe I could spend more time with Kizumi...would it make him feel better?

"Kizumi, honey...you're awfully quiet. Are you alright?" My mom asked. She noticed how quiet he had been, too. He looked up at her, clearly forcing his politeness.

"I'm alright...just feeling a little bit sick all of a sudden." He lied to her. She gave him a slightly skeptical look, and then said to him,

"Well, if you'd like I can give you a ride home when we're done so you don't have to walk." 

"That's okay. Thank you, though." He gave her a half smile.

"Sick? That's too bad..." Yuji empathized with him. "Ah, but it does remind me of a story. Shirou, remember that one time when we..." He went on talking about something that happened to us when we ate too much candy one time. I was listening to him and reminiscing, but in the back of mind I felt kind of bad that Kizumi really had no opening into the conversation. It was a memory that Yuji and I shared, and the only thing the others could do was laugh along. Kizumi wasn't going to laugh though.

Something felt different...I could tell that he was jealous but that couldn't have just been it. Kizumi isn't friendly, but for him to have suddenly flipped like that was odd. His thoughts were probably different than what I could probably imagine. If I didn't talk to him, I would never understand. It really wasn't fair for me to just leave him in the dark like this, but it also wasn't fair for him to leave me in the dark either. When I talked to him, I really hoped he wouldn't shut down on me or get angry. Maybe when we walked to his house I could explain why Yuji was even here today. It wasn't like I had planned for him to show up.

In fact, I had tried to tell my Mom that I'd already made plans with Kizumi, but she just assumed that we would all be able to hang out together like any other group of boys. Of course, I couldn't just say, 'Yeah, but Kizumi hates him so...no'. Then she'd question me and try to talk to them and that'd just be a mess. Then again, this air around Kizumi was kind of making me feel like maybe I should have said something to her...even if I had, though, this sort of thing was probably bound to happen eventually. Kizumi and I just needed to talk, and that was exactly what I planned to do.

After we finished dinner and cleaned up our mess, My Mom offered to take Kizumi home one more time since he was in route anyways. He declined once more, and she only nodded and then told us to be careful and to wear jackets. When she stepped outside, Yuji followed. However, he stopped and turned to give me a quick hug before saying,

"Se you later, man."

"Sure." I smiled, still kind of surprised by the hug. I was fully aware that Kizumi had seen it. What I wasn't prepared for was the look on his face when I turned around. He almost looked like he was choking. Concern ran down my face and I stepped closer to him saying, "Kizumi, are you alright?"

"...Yeah." He replied after a second and then moved past me to the open door. I grabbed my jacket off of the hook on the wall and followed him outside. Mom drove past us as we walked. I didn't allow even a minute go by before I spoke up.

"I'm sorry that Yuji was there. I tried to tell my Mom that I'd already made plans, but she just kept telling me that we would all be able to hang out together. If I had known I would have told you. He literally showed up only a few minutes before you got my house." I explained. He was quiet, though. In fact, no matter what I tried to say to him he was dead silent. By the time we got to his house I was stating to feel a bit scared. We stopped in front of his porch as the light flicked on.

He turned around and stared at me for a long time before reaching out and brushing his fingers along my cheek gently. I held still as he touched me, and tried my absolute hardest to read his expression. Not much of the light was on his face, though. I thought he was going to just drop his hand and say goodbye, but he leaned in and carefully placed his lips on mine. It was a simple kiss at first, and then grew more intricate as the seconds passed. When his fingers slipped under my chin and pulled me into the kiss a little more I felt my stomach flutter like crazy and smiled a little bit as Kizumi pulled away. I loved that feeling so much...

"I'll see you on Monday." He said with a straight face. As his fingers left my face and he slipped inside, I was left with the beating my heart in my ears and a chill around me. I didn't mind it though...I turned away from his house and began the walk home. He couldn't be too angry with me if he was able to kiss me like that and say goodbye so calmly, right?