Never Going To Be Right {taekook/vkook au}

Chapter 14

Jungkook's pov

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After a few minutes of being in Jimin's embrace, he started to guide me over to one of the beds, still not letting go.

"Do you want me to tell Tae what's going on?", I heard Jimin quietly whisper. He sounded as if he was trying not to upset me more by asking in a quiet voice. I shook my head no pulling out of the embrace a little. I wiped at my eyes furiously trying to get all of the tears out of them, so it didn't make me look anymore weak then Taehyung or Jimin already probably thought I was.

"You sure you don't want me to tell him instead?", Jimin asked again. In answer I turned towards Tae who was sitting on the other bed looking back at me with expectance and confusion combined.

I really didn't want to do this. I wanted to run back into the bathroom and just lay there crying until I fell asleep but that would just create a bigger problem then I already had to handle.

I couldn't think of how to explain all of this to Tae without stuttering every five seconds, so I did what I thought would explain enough for now. I lifted up my shirt to show the few scars that littered the area above the waistbandof my sweats there in a assortment of colors depending on how old they were.

I quickly glanced up to Tae to see him frozen in place with his eyes wide. I took that in the worst way posssible. He had to be disgusted by the look of the horrible thing I did to myself because I couldn't handle hate from people.

I felt like every tear I had cried in the last three years came back tenfold. I let my shirt fall as Jimin brought me into his chest letting me get his shirt all wet with my crying. I could feel him start to rub my back again but I felt as if I wasn't even there. All I could focus on was the fact that I just showed Tae something I never wanted him to know about for the rest of my life. Thinking about all of this just made me cry harder and harder until I was sobbing as I clutched onto Jimins shirt for dear life.

I don't know how long I was there trying my best to calm down. I was trying to time my breaths with Jimins to calm me down until I could breath normally and the tears stopped rapidly coming down my face. I noticed how silent that the room was even though there was the three of us in here. I felt Jimin try to lift my face up from his chest and I let him, not really having the energy to struggle with him.

When I made eye contact with him, I could see so much worry and concern within his eyes that it made me feel bad for being the cause of all of it.

He then startled me by splitting the silence that was hanging over the room, "Are you okay now?". No. No, I was not okay if I was being honest, but I knew that that wasn't the answer that he really needed right now, but before I could respond Tae talked.

"Yeah, I don't want to be rude or anything but I have some questions to ask..." Taehyung said startling me again. I almost forgot that he was here. I turned my head to look to him, slightly backing away from the comfort of Jimin, letting my feet dangle off the bed. I looked up at tae's face prepared to see that disgusted or hated look that I knew would be there.

What I wasn't expecting to see was tears silently coming from his eyes, that he made no effort to wipe away. I could feel my heart shattering at the sight. Why is he crying instead of trying to get away from me? Wasn't he disgusted and disappointed in me for doing this to myself?

I felt like I couldn't control myself as I got up off of the bed and went over to sit down beside him on the bed. I tentively reached up my hand and tried to wipe away the tears that were running down his cheeks, my heart going a hundred miles an hour just from being this close to him right now. He chuckled at me quietly for doing the motion and cracked a rueful smile, not quite looking me in the eyes yet.

"I just have two Questions.." he said trailing off obviously waiting for me to give him the okay to continue. I slightly nodded my head letting him know that it was okay with me, even though my whole body was filling with dread.

"Why...?", Taehyung said this so quietly I almost didn't hear it. I looked down at my hands in my lap, thinking this over for a second. Did he want the long answer or the short answer? Did he want all of the truth or just some of it? I looked over at Jimin you was looking down at his own hands not providing me with any assistance in this matter.

"I do it because of all the negative comments I get on our videos.", I said in a small voice hoping that that would be enough of an answer for him. But I had no luck with that as he looked back at me, signaling that he wanted me to further elaborate on what I meant. I sighed putting my hands to my face trying to come with a better answer where I didn't have to say much, because if I did I knew that I would end up crying even more then I already had today.

"I-I just feel like no one even likes me being in this group because I'm not good at anything so I take it out on myself for being as bad as I am.", I rushed out of my mouth. I didn't even know if Taehyung heard me because my head was still in my hands waiting for some sort of response from his side. I could feel how tense the silence was and I hated it so much. It was almost worse than having Tae try to get away from me in disgust. Maybe that was why he wasn't talking. Maybe he was too mad at me for not being able to control my own self hatred that he decided that he didn't even want to speak to me anymore? Maybe he thought that I was jus-

"Why d-didn't you come to any of us instead?", Taehyung said interrupting my thoughts. I heard a sniffle come from him and looked up to see that tears were still coming from his eyes. I could feel my chest constrict at the sight of the person I cared about the most crying and it was my fault too.

I remembered that he had asked me something and that I should probably respond so I said in a small voice, "I thought that all of you would think I was worthless for doing this to myself and would kick me out of the band and I didn't want to leave all of you guys.". I could feel Taehyung gaze fall on me halfway through what I was saying but didn't have the courage to look back at him .

"None of us would ever think you would ever think that you were worthless Jungkook, " he said forcefully, catching my attention to look back into his eyes. They held something that I hadn't expected to be there, hurt.

"None of us would have wanted for you to be in any pain over some stupid people on the internet who don't have a life so they try to ruin yours. And who besides those people ever said that you weren't good at anything. You're the Golden Maknae for a reason! I know for a fact that you are excellent at pretty much everything that you try to do!", Tae exclaimed, making my eyes widen as I processed it all.

He looked over at Jimin, who I almost forgot was still present in the room with us, and shook his head at him. "So this is what you guys didn't want me to know... ", Taehyung said sounding as if he felt betrayed over the fact that we didn't tell him about this. But in hindsight if I was in his position I know I would probably feel the same way towards the two of them, but I would probably also not be as calm as Taehyung is being right now. I'm realizing that he has every right to be mad at me for not sharing this information with him.

Especially when he could have probably been the person that could've helped me the most out of everyone.

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A/N

I have Finally updated for you all and I give you this piece of poop. I know that this probably sucked and contained a lot of dialogue plus the very abrupt conclusion, so I'm very sorry.

Anyways, as always thank you for reading and please Comment Vote and Share( if you feel generous)!!!