Hakuoki : Tale Of Yuki

Chapter 23: Truth (part.2)

This world is a scary place.
And the people are full of madness.

The truth is, I am a hopeless coward.

I am afraid of many things.

The sound the howling wind makes during the storm. The view of lighting clashing with each others. The faces other people makes when they looked at me. The angry shouting villagers when they came to our house. The look on kaa-san's eyes when I last saw her. Tou-san's thoughts when he took me far far away...

And me.

I was afraid of myself.

There's a lot of things I don't understand about me. For the things I couldn't understand, I found myself end up making a lie to make up for it.

Because I needed to believe in something.

Even if it's a lie.

Because not knowing anything.... is scary.

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The first time I lied when I got hurt when I secretly snuck out.

Kaa-san never let me go outside. She said I shouldn't go out since I was 'special'. It was something I wasn't able to understand as a child. She made me promise not to go out without her permission.

I don't know why... but I snuck out of the house when she wasn't looking. I didn't think of anything. I just wanted to see the outside world.

I remember the sky being so blue. So broad and so mesmerizing.

It was something probably normal to other people. Something mundane in their everyday lives..

But to me it was the most amazing thing ever.

I was walking. Just walking. Trying to see if the sky would end somewhere.

But it didn't. It was endless.

Then, I saw some children, my age. They were doing playing something. It looks so fun. I asked them if I could join them. But the moment they saw me I didn't expect screamings, fingers pointing at my direction.

I was confused. Why do they look so scared?

I was shocked when they began shouting and throwing rocks at me and I began running when the rocks starting to hit me.

I came back home with kaa-san asking me where I've been and what happened since I was battered with injuries.

I didn't want to worry her so I told her, I was searching for Father and got chased by a wild boar and fell down.

Kaa-san got really mad...

I'm sorry... Kaa-san...

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The consequences of my first lie... was a horrible one. Kaa-san knew I lied. Since now, people had found out about me.

Was that what Kaa-san trying to avoid?

Is it bad for people to know I'm Tou-san and Kaa-san child?

I don't understand.

Ever since the villagers found out about me. Everything seems to be our fault. When strange things happen. When someone got into an accident. When their corps isn't growing. When the land starting dry up...

In front of the house, Kaa-san was always with people who would be shouting at her. Angry voices. Scary voices. Kaa-san would just bowing her head. Apologizing again and again.