Tristan and Miles: Baby Hollingsworth (BOYXBOY)

Chapter 22 Reality sets

Authors note: So let's have a recap! Lexi pushed Tristan for money but of course, Tristan forgives her. Miles Tristan and the rest of the gang graduates! Blah blah! Now Miles leaves for training.

Miles POV

I took a deep breath. It was 2 in the morning and my husband was sound asleep. I looked at our child and seen that she was asleep too. My thoughts were killing. Today, I was leaving for training. I didn't know whether to feel happy or sad. It was bittersweet. Hope turned a year old in a few weeks and I was gonna miss that. I was gonna miss my daughter. My little princess. I wasn't gonna be able to watch her grow. But I guess this is the sacrifice I have to make for her. For my family. I lean over to Tristan and kiss his ear. Then I started to hear the sniffles. I looked over to see that he had been crying. I got out of bed and headed to the door. He sat up and stared At me.

"Let's go in the kitchen, baby." I tell him. He gets up and we both go to the kitchen together. Tristan sits down at the coffee table with his head down. I start up the coffee maker and sit beside him. I tap his shoulder and he slowly looks up at me. His eyes were red. I take his hand and squeeze it gently. My heart sank instantly as I see his eyes watery. He stared down at the table, trying to avoid my stare. I lifted his face up to me. He slowly looked up at me.

"Please don't make this harder on me that it already is," I told him, letting go of his hand.

"This is hard for you? Miles I'm the one being left!" Tristan exclaimed. "You have no idea how I'm feeling! It's like you don't care!!!"

"WHAT DO YOU-" I realized that I was raising my voice. "What do you mean I don't care? Tristan, I'm the one leaving. You don't know how awful I feel about this..."

"Well then you don't have to go!!! Just...stay here with me and Hope. Just get a regular job, I don't care! Just don't leave us!" Tristan sobbed. Seeing him like this hurt me. But I didn't have a choice anymore. I signed the papers. It's a done deal. I shook my head at him.

"I can't, Tris. I swore in and I took a oath. I'm gonna do this. We're just going to have to make the sacrifice for our family..." Tristan wiped the tears from his eyes and shook his head.

"I've sacrificed so much. I've given up so many things for you. When do I get to be happy?" I stared at my husband,
Unable to answer that question. Everything that has happened between in the past year has been hard on him the most. A part of me feels like I'm being selfish but this isn't just about me. It's about Hope. What I'm doing is all for Hope.

"I'm so sorry, Tris. I promise I'll make it up to you. Okay? When I get back, we'll go to Paris!" He looked at me and smiled.

"Paris? Really? Well, I've always wanted to stay in Paris," he said. "But all our family and friends here in Toronto?"

"Look, if you wanna go to Paris then fine. We can just go for vacation. Whatever you want, I promise. I'm just asking you to please be patient with me for the 6 to 8 months," I wanted things to be okay between us before I left. I knew it'd be hard but we both had to be strong. He nodded as he stood up.

"Fine. Fine I'll paste on a happy face just so we can get through this," he rolled his eyes. "But I'm not gonna say goodbye to you at the airport. I'll have Anya and Owen bring Hope to see you but I'm not gonna come," my expression changed. I stared at him, in disbelief.

"Tris...come on, I have to see you before I leave. I'll go cra-" I stood up and pulled him to me. He looked away and shook his head as tears started to fall.

"I don't wanna say...goodbye. You and I will never say good bye to each other. I just can't Miles. I can't watch you walk out of my life...I just..." he started to break down in my arms. I pulled him against me and patted his back. I kissed the top of his forehead and I found myself crying, too. I slowly pulled away from him and wiped his tears.

"I'm not walking out on you, Okay? God, I love you so much. You're the love of my life. I'm going to miss you and Hope so much..." I pulled him in again and we held each other. Moments later, we headed to the living room where Tristan had fallen asleep on me. It was 5 in the morning and I had heard Hope fussing upstairs. I slowly carry Tristan and laid him on the couch. I put a blanket over him and rushed up to check on her.

"Ba ba ba doo doo chee Chee ma ma ma," I watched her from the door as he babbled. I slowly walked in the room, trying not to startle her. She immediately looks at me and smiles.

"Da da," she says as she sees me. I try to hold back my tears as I pick her up and hold her. We sit in her rocking chair and I enjoy the moment.

"Hope, daddy's gonna go away for a while. But I'll be back... Okay? Daddy is doing this for you. I promise I'll always be thinking of you, sweetheart. You're my little angel," I tell her as a tear escaped from my eyes. She stared at me for a while, trying to understand what I was saying.

"Da da yeeeysh," Holy crap, did she say dads Yes?! Woaaaah. I kissed her forehead and smiled. She's gonna grow up so much by the time I get back. She'll be a big girl and I won't get to see her grow. This was part of my suffering. Because her bond with Tristan was stronger than I could ever have with her. But it was going to be like that. It was going to be okay, though. I know Tristan will take good care of her. We sat there, in the rocking chair, as we both drifted into sleep.