Sail Away- Nathan Sykes

Chapter 8: Sleepless

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                                          @@@@@@__-Nathan’s POV-__@@@@@@

Monita sat quietly cleaning Griffin’s wounds. Her fingers gently going over the cuts he’d received to his chest and the arm he’d had plastered, she then turned to do his face. She had to sit up on her knees to dab the cotton ball on the gash above his eye. He winced once or maybe twice, but other than that he was watching her intently as she focused her hands to do their work.

She was really beautiful, even with those cruel bruises and the cut below her left ear. All I really wanted to do was pick her up and be her saviour, to be the one that cleaned her scars even if I had no idea what I was doing.

I sighed and turned to Jay who was obviously, very, very, very obviously watching the two as well. He held up his book at least to try and look like he was doing something else and I realised I’d been watching her without any type of cover up. It didn’t really matter; the two of them were so close and so intense that they wouldn’t even notice.

“You think they’re dating?” Jay whispered to me, leaning in close and his breath just above a whisper.

“They’re not,” I reply.

He looked like he didn’t believe me, I don’t blame him. At that moment her fingers trailed down to Griffin’s lips and she traced the cuts there. I could barely take it, watch the two of them. Knowing it could be me, wishing it could be me… Wait Nath! Pull yourself together, it’s not like you would have really stood a chance. You’re not even allowed to have a girlfriend remember!!! I tell myself and straighten up.

“You should have told me about Diego!” Griffin said sternly and looked away from her eyes.

“You can’t save me every time Griffin,” she replied looking down to the medical kit in front of her.

“But I wouldn’t have had to this time if you would have told me,” he continued. She slammed down the box and pushed away from him.

“Griffin it’s not like you can just go and beat him to death without consequences!” she said angrily.

“Monita,” Griffin said softly and grabbed her around her waist wincing at the pain but doing it swiftly without breaking. She stopped moving and glared at him bowing her head so that her brown hair covered her face and the dark pain that scarred her face. “Monita,” he continued and lowered his head so he could look into her eyes.

“What is it Griffin,” she continued snapping her head up to look at him.

For a moment my stomach lurched and they looked like they might kiss. They both held their gaze intently and I found myself almost heartbroken that I’d lost something before it started. Yeah, I’ll admit it, I was falling for Monita.

“You have a cut,” he said and pushed away her hair to look at the cut. She blushed and looked away while he checked it.

“I’m going to bed,” I say seeing enough that my chest could handle.

“But it’s only eight!” Jay said from where his book was, “And we haven’t eaten yet!”

“I’m not hungry,” I say and climb into my bunk, closing the door and turning off the lights. I had top bunk and a small long window showed the Island vanishing in a blue dusk.

It seemed to me that forever had passed, noise told me that the guys had come into the room. Tom’s snoring told me that he was deep in sleep and Siva’s low breathing told me that he also had fallen asleep. I simply couldn’t.

I wouldn’t stop thinking about Monita and it was driving me insane. Seriously! What was wrong with her, what was wrong with me!

With a grudging sigh I pushed myself up and out of my bed. Maybe the sea air would clear my head a little. In truth it did, when I first stepped out of the cabin and into the cool night air a breeze of carelessness washed over me. It set my head straight.

Even if I wanted to date Monita I couldn’t, the guys and I had a silent pack that at least two of us had to stay single and although Siva and Jay were single at the moment I had to always be ‘free’. If I really loved her, I would forget my feelings. Monita would have gotten death threats, harassment; acceptance from a lot of the fans, but some of the others could be really harsh. Trust me, I know. It happened to my last girlfriend and we broke up over it. It was crushing, heart breaking, and I didn’t want to go through it again or put someone else through it either. So that was why I had to forget those fee…

“What are you doing up?” I heard the sweet voice say through the dark and I forgot what I was thinking about.

“Ahh… Ah?” I stutter trying to think of something. “I needed to think,” I say quickly after.

“Ohh…” she replied through the darkness. It was a blue black kind of colour, rather mystical. “I do that a lot, just sit up here and watch the stars, smell the salt and feel the breeze,” she said pushing her head back to look at the sky and let her bronze and caramel hair float out behind her.

“Makes you forget everything,” I add and she turned to smile at me. The night had cast shadows across her face and hid the bruises that cursed it.

“Nearly,” she whispered before looking down at her feet quickly and mumbling something else unheard.

“…Are you alright?” I ask slowly watching her take a deep breath.

“I’m fine Nathan… I’m fine,” she said sounding reserved and kept her eyes on the dark horizon.

“You don’t seem it,” I continue and moved a little closer to her. She took in a quiet sharp breath when I touched her hand. You can’t do this to her… My mind screams, but it’s just such a strong pull to her. I know I want to touch her face and hold her hand, I know that I want to kiss her and love her… But I know I don’t want to hurt her, even if this was just a summer fling.

“You should stay away from me Nathan… I’m not all I want to seem,” she said and slowly pulled her hand away from where I touched it. I couldn’t help but feel a gut clench.

“Sorry,” I whisper and turn to walk away.

“Nath!” she said quickly, almost urgently like I might slip through her fingers. I turned to face her watching as her face contorted for a moment on what to say. “Ahh… Do you want me to show you where a nice place to sit is? On the top deck that is… It’s better than sleeping with a snoring Tom.”

“Alright then,” I say back watching as she locked the steering wheel and walked closer to me.

“Don’t fall in this time,” she said smiling at me as we passed the hammock.

“You’re not going to live that down are you?”

“Nope!”

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