chatㅣjikook

yesunset

jungkook: you're making me scared

jungkook: baby please answer my calls and messages

his heart feels heavy and he's really anxious because jimin somehow ended the call and said he can't see him now and it just made him more worried instead of relaxing eventhough he really should. stress is one thing he shouldn't be encountering with at the moment but it's really pushing him on.

jungkook: fuck please

taehyung: please meet me at the garden

taehyung: i've got you permission from yoongi and seokjin

taehyung: yoongi's gonna bring you down.

jungkook: what

jungkook: why

taehyung: stop being stubborn and just go down

jungkook's rolls his eyes before yoongi enters the room with a wheelchair in hand.

"i don't need that" he can physically move but yoongi ignores him and motions him to sit down, pushing him till the reach the garden and leaves him once he sees taehyung already there.

jungkook moves to sit on the bench, taheyung being unusually silent and just watching him.

"what?" he asks, brows furrowed as takes in taehyung's tired expression.

the nurse wordlessly hands him a piece of paper, folded neatly. jungkook looks confused before opening it, a letter, jungkook muses and knows it's from jimin from the handwriting.

"what is this?"

"i don't know. he told me not to read it and just pass it to you" taehyung shrugs, looking away.

they sat there silently while jungkook reads it and only when he hears the soft sniffling does he look at the younger, silent tears streaming down his face before he's leaving and rushes back into the building, the letter left on the bench.

jungkook,

well i don't really know how to start because there's so much i want to say but nothing comes up to my mind. we all get that sometimes i perhaps. but well i'll start by saying why i'm writing this. i guess i just wanted you to have it with you. something you'll look from time to time when you miss me. not really because it's just word vomit but give me some credit, you won't be able to see me after this. presumably forever but lets not talk about it. i miss you. i don't say it enough and i don't express it enough but i desparately hope you know that i do because it's been really hard for me right now. if you have the time, visit me will you? i know i promised we'll see each other once more but i can't even walk without feeling like fainting anymore i am so sorry. so please? i wanna see you. can you believe that i'm crying now? jesus why am i so weak. it hurts jungkook, it hurts so much and i can't do anything about it. thinking about death, it haunts me so badly. i won't be able to see you anymore. i won't be able to hold you anymore when you're afraid. i won't be able to shower you in kisses and tell you how precious and important you are in my life even if you hate it. i won't be able to tell you i love you everyday of my life. and i know i told you that you should be happy and you should move on but wouldn't it be wonderful if i'm not this twisted? if only it was all a dream and we're completely normal humans with cliche beginnings like bumping into each other on the streets or in a fucking cafe instead of a hospital. that would be wonderful. but i have no regrets. you were the most amazing thing that has happened in my life and i love every single moment i had with you. you and you big bright eyes, your stupid smile which i adore till now and had fallen in love with, your strength and perseverance eventhough you felt like giving up, god i love you so much. i love you so much and i can't even say that anymore because it's going to make me suffer much much more. when i'm left with the few minutes of my life and i think of how much i love you and how much you would hurt and how the light will leave your eyes in a world that is ten times darker, i couldn't bear that. i don't know when and i don't know how but i'll be gone anytime soon. it's really fucking near jungkook so just bear with it and it'll all be over and i'll just be a memory to you and as time passes by, it will not hurt as much as it does now. i want you to know that's iyou'll always have a place in my heart. you've managed to fix me up even for a little while you little fucker, my little fucker. i love you so much.

jimin.

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