Kaisi yeh Yaariyan Season 3

Chapter 117

"Agar tumse tumko mangoon to? Will you marry me...Manik?"

'Did she actually ask that? How could she?' He thought and then realized 'Only she could...only she could love him so deeply, to set herself ablaze to light up his life.'

"No" he said, clearing his throat. "I can't."

"Kyun Manik? Tumne wo ring mere liye lee thi na, mujhe propose karne ke liye?...fir why can't you say yes now?"

Well no-one would ever know that the ring wasn't the only thing he had got for her and Neel wasn't his only reason for going to Panchgani. 24 hours ago, just before leaving for Mumbai, he had finalized a deal with a property dealer. He had bought a house overlooking the hills, just two blocks ahead from Nandini's quarter. It was supposed to remain a surprise... till their wedding.

He could never forget Panchgani....those hot flushes of love, that tinge of jealousy, the rumblings of his heart, the desperation to meet her, their cute squabbles over nothing....her irritating him with custom made stupid one liners , and then just as suddenly, retreating into his arms, with those innocent eyes seeking unspoken promises from him. How could he ever forget those scattered moments of magic, created out of nothing but sheer love, that feeling of floating like a cloud over the valleys...But then life took a sharp bend and put his dizzying happiness to an abrupt end.

He wanted to pick up those colourful threads from where he had to abandon them and weave a life full of colours for them. He hadn't just purchased a house, he had been trying to buy her a fairy tale amidst her favourite hills and beloved children. And now, he wouldn't be able to give her that house, or any house for that matter. How could he buy her dreams when he barely had anything to buy reality.

Only he knew what was going on inside him. "That was yesterday..jab main Manik Malhotra tha, today I am just Manik, and there is a bloody world of difference between the two. At this moment, I have nothing to give you except the burden of my frustrations and failures. I can't give you the kind of happy life jo tum deserve karti ho..and till the time that I can't afford it, I can't marry you Nandini."

"Kuch nai badla Manik, tum mere liye kal bhi jo the, aaj bhi wahi ho and hamesha wo hi rahoge. Ghar paise se nahi banta Manik, paise se sirf makaan khareed sakte hain. If money could buy everything, wouldn't you have bought your share of happiness...your lost childhood. I have a job, I know the pay is meagre, but we will manage and then you can figure out what to do."

"Have you lost it? Like seriously? You will go out and earn for us and I will just figure things out??? No fucking way...ok..don't you even think.."

"Yeh hamare beech mein mera tumhara, gender rules, when did all this come in Manik? Isse pehle to nahi tha.. Jab mera pain heal karne ke liye tum, you were taking hits on your wounded body. ..Tab to mera..tumhara alag nahi tha.. Jab night after night you held me in your arms just so that I could sleep tab to nahi tha yeh mera tumhara , Jab mere liye tum injured hokar bhi Delhi- dehradun- panchgani mein bhatak rahe the, tabbhi mera tumhara nahi tha.. Jab mere sare problems tumhare hain, jab meri har smile tumhari hai, when my bloody heart is yours fir only salary meri kaise ho sakti hai. Tum to love ke sath sath friendship ke bhi rules break kar rahe ho Manik and its not done." Nandini asked clutching his shirt.

It was becoming increasing difficult for him to defend his point. On one hand, he wanted nothing more than to surrender to her, he was so tired. But on the other hand, he couldn't bring himself to agree to her. He loved her way too much to push her into this darkness that was just waiting to suck him in.

"Why are you being stubborn Nandini?" He grabbed her at the waist "Why don't you understand ki sab kuch itna simple nahi hai? I left music half way three years ago..no one in the industry recognizes me now... I didn't even get to finish college...because of that goddamn accident and the brain damage. Its one thing to walk into your own company and learn things by sheer grit, but when you have to justify yourself to the world, talent is not enough, you need to show something...and I have no freaking idea right now, how to build that up. How can I drag you in the middle of all this? I love you Nandini, I can't just gamble with your life. I need time to sort things, to sort life..to sort us..."