Immortal Impossibility (A Damon and Elena Baby Story)

Chapter 2

I kept walking. I didn't know where I was going, but I knew I had to keep moving. I always did this when I was upset. I ran away.

Maybe if I run away, away from all of this, it will be okay. If I just keep moving, I can't be pulled back. I don't  have to face reality unless I want to. There lies my problem though. I do have to face reality. Don't I? This isn't something I can just run away from. I don't think.

Questions ran through my mind. Somehow, I was at the place that I welcomed most- the cemetery.

Every single person that I loved lied here.

I replayed that thought in my head and it sounded kind of sad. It seemed like every person I loved eventually died too young and were put in the godforsaken cemetery.

Maybe that was my reason for not being able to accept having a baby. With everything going on in my life, with everyone that dies around me, I came to a conclusion. 

If I love someone, they die.

I was now standing at my parents grave. I sat down and fiddled with some grass.

The grass was so lucky. All it had to do was sit and exist. It had no problems. No enemies. It simply just existed. It was free.

Was I just existing? Maybe that was my problem all along. I wasn't living, I was just simply existing. But I was far from free.

I wish I was grass.

I was thrown back into reality when I cut my finger on the grass.

Blood oozed from my finger momentarily before the wound closed up and it appeared I never cut myself in the first place.

I looked up at the stones in front of me. On them was written two names Grayson Gilbert and Miranda Gilbert.

Under it was-

Parents, friends, taken too early from us.

It was true. They were taken too early from us. However I would rather them be wherever they are now than here.

When my parents died 2 years ago, I would often visit their graves, and write in my diary. I knew that they weren't there, but I guess it gave me comfort. Just as it is giving me comfort now. I would write everything in my diary. I didn't do that much anymore. Instead of writing it in a diary, I just spoke it out to my loved ones graves. I believed that they were listening now. I knew they were listening now.

When I used to write in my diaries, I didn't believe my parents were there, because I didn't believe in much of anything. Now that I know about vampires, werewolves, ghosts, doppelgangers, witches, and everything else supernatural that somehow resides in our little town of Mystic Falls, I know that when I come to talk to my loved ones, they are here. Listening. So I talked.

"I know that you probably aren't happy with everything I have chosen for my life. I'm not that happy about it either. If I could have chosen a different path, I would have. How can I say that though? I mean, yes, I wish I could see you guys again. I wish that more than anything, and I wish you guys would have never died. But what if I wouldn't have been rescued that night? I wouldn't be graduating. I wouldn't have been there for Jeremy. I wouldn't have met Stefan or Damon. I wouldn't have met the real Caroline. I wouldn't have got to know the real Bonnie. Maybe it is time I got to see how my life was supposed to be. If I would've not been rescued that night, I would have never had the opportunity to live. I wouldn't be pregnant right now. Maybe that is what fate had in mind for me. Maybe it is time that I stop simply existing, and I start living."