Chapter 15-
Makinseys Pov
Its been two months since Justin and me had that fight. We havent made contact or any calls. One part of me misses him and the other just wants to say "SCREW IT". After he left I was hurt, I will admit that. Every night I would cry myself to sleep and well.....cut. I didnt cut for him.....I just cut to get my mind off things. I was never happy. He had dug a deep whole in to my heart and I was stuck there. Ryan would always try but it never worked. I never got any death threats after the mess though. I dont know why but it made me suspicious. Alex had texted me asking if I would come to the party and of course I said "No" because I have no part in me to have fun. But she begged and I finally fell in her bestfriend trap. So at this moment im getting ready for that party. Oh yea and Trent....he moved here. He actually liked the place.
I had picked out a black dress that fitted me in all the right places and then the other reason I wore it was because it matched my feelings completely. I decided to wear eyeliner, mascara, and light eyeshadow. For my hair...I just curled it into light ringlets at the bottom of each strand. After I was done a car honked outside and I knew it was Alex. I jumped in the car after locking my house. Yes my house. I didnt want my parents finding out about the cutting so I moved. Im still in LA, California. Im just in another neighbor hood. My house is pretty nice. Its not a mansion yet its not small either. It has six bedrooms, walk in closets, and three bathrooms so yea....it was ok.Plus Trent was my neighbor but he went to college alot and I didnt talk to almost anybody. I hopped out of my thoughts when we arrived to the house and their was like eighty vehicles. I walked in as did Alex and we walked to the bar.
"There is so many people." I mouth because the music is loud.
"Yah....I know." She says.
"Why did you bring me here? Im already regretting it." I say.
"Thats why...Before you go off hating me just talk. Im gonna go hang with Jordan." I looked in the direction she pointed and realized who it was. And yea...she was still dating Jordan. It was Justin. He was talking to some guys and would take glances at me but I ignored him and just ordered some drinks. Justin still hadnt talked to me and I dont know if Alex expected him to talk to me or if she expected me to talk to him. Either way I wasnt going to. Lots of people were leaving and I didnt want to get stuck here with Jordan, Alex, and Justin so I walked out the door with the crowd. I walked to the back just looking out into the nice, breezy woods. I always had wanted to live in the woods. I thought it was peaceful and beautiful. I was soon interupted by somebody.(I know what yall are thinking. But..-NOPE!) It was Alex.
"He didnt talk to you?" She asks.
"Nope was he supposed to?" I question her.
"Well no but I was hoping th-" She was trying to say something but I cut her off.
"Yah I know. You were hoping we and him would walk off madly in love to start our lives and live happily ever after but..NO. Im sure as hell not talking to him after everything and im pretty sure he doesnt want to speak to me otherwise he would have already done it. Im not gonna be the one begging on my knees for him to take me back because he hurt me. He dug a hole that I couldnt get out off. He trapped me in another world filled with dark, sad, hurtful crying nights. I dont cry for him and I sure as hell dont cut for him. I do these things because im stuck in life with no way to go forward or backward thanks to him!" I whisper yell. I hadnt noticed somebody standing behind me until Alex nodded her finger to behind me. I turned around and there he stood. I was happy he heard all that but then again I wasnt. I was also happy to see him....but also very fucking mad at him and I guess the dark side of me took over because before I knew anything I blurted something out.
